What's next. (and I mean this in a good way)
From the moment I got up this morning, all I could think about was what that one customer said last week about still feeling insecure 3 years after her divorce.
MAN, I AM NOT going to let myself linger with that feeling that long! So I've been thinking about the reasons for the insecurity... the "he doesn't love me anymore?" and how I wrapped my whole life around his behaviors and opinions.
And what I've come up with was memories of high school.... the insecurity was no different then... friends came and went... and there were cliques where some people didn't like you just because your hair was different or because you just didn't fit in....
And I thought about how those people who didn't accept me as I was back then weren't worth my time and would drain me of my energy if I tried to get them to accept me - and how those efforts never worked anyways. Sure, it hurt at those moments of rejection, but I moved on to find other people who VALUED me for who I am. And those times weren't because I was searching for people to value me... I just DISCOVERED them when we connected!
And I also thought about the things that I've done over the years that have made me feel strong, capable, confident... And I realized that I do that when I'm mountain biking - there are times where crashes are unavoidable, and times where I've gotten hurt. And those are the times where I give myself a moment to let the pain subside, and then I GET UP, make sure I'm OK, and even though I might be bleeding a little, I start moving again.... I've NEVER had a bad ride, and those crashes just made me a better mountain biker.
So today, I MOVED.
Physically, I kicked off my workout... pushed myself to try to hit goals today (higher heart rate, stronger impacts) and I began to plan out my foods so that I get the best results. I can't wait to see the results this next summer...
Financially, I made a list of what I NEED so that when I went to the store I wasn't distracted with little things, like magazines or home decor stuff, so that I can keep the money I would have spent and get my savings going so it can grow for my future. Sure, it's just small change right now, but if I stay focused, eventually it will be BIG. And I really want to have some adventures in the next few years...
And work wise, I let myself focus more on doing the best job I can so that I can take PRIDE in my work, build up a better network in case I need it...
And emotionally, I'm paying attention to the little things that make me happy, make me content and I let the thoughts of them fill up my soul...
Because these are the things that make me feel stronger, more confident, secure with myself - and knowing that I'm DOING it. And you know, the best way to get even with an X is to thrive....
MAN, I AM NOT going to let myself linger with that feeling that long! So I've been thinking about the reasons for the insecurity... the "he doesn't love me anymore?" and how I wrapped my whole life around his behaviors and opinions.
And what I've come up with was memories of high school.... the insecurity was no different then... friends came and went... and there were cliques where some people didn't like you just because your hair was different or because you just didn't fit in....
And I thought about how those people who didn't accept me as I was back then weren't worth my time and would drain me of my energy if I tried to get them to accept me - and how those efforts never worked anyways. Sure, it hurt at those moments of rejection, but I moved on to find other people who VALUED me for who I am. And those times weren't because I was searching for people to value me... I just DISCOVERED them when we connected!
And I also thought about the things that I've done over the years that have made me feel strong, capable, confident... And I realized that I do that when I'm mountain biking - there are times where crashes are unavoidable, and times where I've gotten hurt. And those are the times where I give myself a moment to let the pain subside, and then I GET UP, make sure I'm OK, and even though I might be bleeding a little, I start moving again.... I've NEVER had a bad ride, and those crashes just made me a better mountain biker.
So today, I MOVED.
Physically, I kicked off my workout... pushed myself to try to hit goals today (higher heart rate, stronger impacts) and I began to plan out my foods so that I get the best results. I can't wait to see the results this next summer...
Financially, I made a list of what I NEED so that when I went to the store I wasn't distracted with little things, like magazines or home decor stuff, so that I can keep the money I would have spent and get my savings going so it can grow for my future. Sure, it's just small change right now, but if I stay focused, eventually it will be BIG. And I really want to have some adventures in the next few years...
And work wise, I let myself focus more on doing the best job I can so that I can take PRIDE in my work, build up a better network in case I need it...
And emotionally, I'm paying attention to the little things that make me happy, make me content and I let the thoughts of them fill up my soul...
Because these are the things that make me feel stronger, more confident, secure with myself - and knowing that I'm DOING it. And you know, the best way to get even with an X is to thrive....
Replies
This journal speaks to me on so many levels. I\'m not even going to talk about the town where I went to high school.
I need to start making lists too when I go to the store. I need to cut expenses and put more money in my Smarty Pig acct or my emergency fund. I save my change at the end of the day. I manage to save several hundreds of dollars a year. While it might not seem like much the pennies do grow into dollars.
You are thriving.
You and Trisha are inspiring me to save every penny I can. I have been doing a pretty good job lately, but I can do better. And making list that isn\'t a bad idea either! You are really inspiring with your journals. I might not Mountain Bike but as a kid I rode my bike everywhere, even to the point of thinking I could never drive a car!LOL! And your absolutely right, you fall down scrape a knee draw a little blood, but you get back up and keep on going and at the end of the ride, whoo-hoo wasn\'t that a blast can\'t wait to do it again! Thanks for some great ideas and reading! You are more than Thriving!! Your living!
Hey, I\'m just THRILLED that I have any change left at all... the X used to steal it as soon as I\'d get it. I need to get one of those fancy jars that say \"vacation fund\" on it or maybe I should make one? I\'m pretty crafty. Now let\'s see how full I can get it...
I love your posts they are so positive.
Yes, my husband has been stealing change and toothfairy money lately. It\'s pretty low. I relate.
Glad it\'s going toward positive instead of more misery!