What now

so after 12 months off work with crippling acute depression and anxiety my employers have kindly said I will be dismissed from end of December. Now they’ve been nice about it, better than most. I’m trying to secure early retirement on health grounds but it is difficult. What the the future hold for me? I’ve worked with this employer for 32 years. I can’t even go out of the house since I am scared I’ll kill myself. 

Medication and talking therapies don’t work on me: my clinicians say I’m treatment resistant! Not something I’m proud of!