What I Know

I have a post from a fiend,
   The worst battle you have to fight is between what you know and what you feel. 
WOW!  Has this become my reality recently. I have spent the last two and a half years in this on again off again relationship.  We have finally filed for divorce and it is so painful.  When the last daughter finally left the nest I thought maybe this could be a new beginning.  Nothing ever came of it.  He went to work like he always did, talked about his job like usual and never once saw the pain I was feeling.  I started taking things down off the walls in preparation for the new beginning.  Nothing was ever replaced.  No new pictures, no new paint, no new beginning.  No new promises of a new beginning.  So now we are packing the house to get it ready to sell.  I feel unbearable sadness.  While I am grieving I am living with a girlfriend, he is at the house.  I know how I feel.  I need feelings he doesn't have to give.  He tells me he is hurt, apologizes  for the mistakes yet doesn't know what they were.