What Hope?

OK so Pat's in heaven and he's fine,now that leave's me and the kid's,we have all the worries and all the stuff that goes on in this life,so,question is what to do with this life? I would LOVE to go ahead and join Pat up there where all is perfect and no pain no financial worries,but, reality is I'm here and have to pay the bills,get a stone,somehow get his truck (which blew up 3 hours after he died) to TN from MS.Not to mention getting a job,something that I never had to do and am not qualified for anything.How am I suppose to have any hope of a future without him?Alot of people say well your 47 and young enough to remarry,WHAT? are they CRAZY? How in the world am I suppose to do that? I met him at college,I am totally devoted to him as I have been since I was 19.Just because he died doesn't mean you stop loving him.I can't imagine ever being with another man.The very thought of this life without him makes me sick.This life is just so unfair,but,we have to live through it,somehow.Question is how to go on,how to have hope,The only answer I have found so far is pray,church and believe that when I die that since I know Pat's in heaven and I am saved that I will be with him again .Still doesn't really give a answer for what to do in this life though.