What did I do

I have to wonder as of the last few days what in the heck did I do.  Was this surgery really worth all the crap that I have endured.  I'm sick and tired of protein drinks, sick and tired of water, sick and tired of pretty much everything.  Then I am just plain tired all the time and the people around me don't seem to get it.  If I sleep all day I get complaints from those around me about the fact that I slept all day.  Comments like "its about time you got up" for crap sake I'm just a little over two weeks out from major surgery and am doing the best that I can.  I thought that during the time my husband was supposed to be home he was supposed to be there so that I could lean on him to help me.  So that I could sleep/rest whenever I needed to and he would be there for me to help with our child and the house and pets.  But evidently what is meant by him being home to help me is to make me feel like crap because I am not up and about taking care of everything.  I finally broke and told him that if he wants to continue to act like a selfish child that is fine with me but that I wouldn't settle for second best any longer.  If I'm not going to settle for second best/status quo for my health why would I settle for it in my personal life.  That is when I informed him that I will give him six months to get his act together or I would file for divorce.  He of course told me that there was nothing wrong and that it was all in my head and I didn't know what I was talking about.  He thinks everything is just fine the way it is and he is not going to change anything.  So then I asked him if he wasn't going to change what reason is there to wait the six months then I should just go ahead and file.  I was then informed by him that if I file for divorce he will file for full custody of our child and make sure that I never see him again.  Haha good luck in trying.  But that hurt because never once did I tell him that I was going to take him away from our son.  He's a long haul truck driver and I told him that he could see him anytime he wanted when he was in town.  Provided he didn't take him out of school or therapy I didn't care.  He is the father and deserves to have a continued relationship with him.  I was told that he didn't care what I was offering that if I didn't stay married he would do whatever he could to have our son removed from me.  Then he had the nerve to tell me that I was acting like a child because I am insistent on this.  Who's acting like a child?  Later on that day my mother comes over and can tell that something is wrong.  When she asked me I told her it was between my husband and I and not her business.  So she then turns to my husband to ask him what is wrong and of course he spits out his version of the truth.  My own mother then tells me that if I were to proceed with a divorce she would help my husband take my son away from me because she doesn't want to lose her grandson.  What in the hell is it with people.  I never once talked about taking this little boy away from anyone I am just not willing to settle for a marriage that doesn't work both ways.  I'm tired of always giving to everyone and getting nothing in return and now that I need the return there isn't anyone there for me.  If I don't do and act the way they all want me to then they threaten the one thing that means the world to me.  I feel like I have lost both a mother and a husband and it hurts something terrible.  I have to figure out what I am going to do in the future for my son and I.  I know that people have to have a good reason to take my child from me and they don't have it.  It just hurts that they would even think to threaten something like that when I never did.  I'm sure that I am moody with the surgery and healing.  Heck I am so tired its not funny, I can barely eat anything without wanting to throw up.  I have to get used to things.  I am tired of having to contend with it all.  I wish I wouldn't have grown a back bone is the whole problem.  I knew having the surgery would present some problems but not like these ones.  It was my mother and my husband who were my biggest supporters of having this surgery and now they are the ones that are pulling me down the hardest.  I just wish everything was back to "normal" again.  I wish that I could sleep without getting sick in the middle of the night over something.  I wish I could take a sip of water or something without feeling like I need to burp all the time.  I am trying to live by the rules of my new stomach/life and it's giving me grief.  I know this takes times but I am often impatient with things.