we are back together

we have been back together for about 2 weeks. I got a text from him asking for his tools. I told him he could pick them up after I got off of work, well he asked me to go home and get them, I asked my super if I could go get the tools and return them to him. He relunctantly let me. I just went up and got the tools and met him at my place of work in the parking lot, which has plenty of cameras, and everything would be documented.
Well it all went good, I gave him the tools and turned around and walked on back to work. Well he pulled out and went home and I thought that would be it. He called me at work and asked me to call him later, and was nice as pie. I wish I would have just told them to take a message because we have caller id. But needless to say we are back together.
He asked me if I wanted him to move back in, and I told him "yes, of course" but he still is staying at his moms. Which I still think is good at the moment, but we have been spending a lot of time. I am really enjoying our time together at the moment.
But there is one thing his jealousy is taking a toll on me, one day at work he made me cry because he got mad at me. I have super's, and leads, and co workers that are very supportive, but I just wish that he would grow up and get some scruples about him.
As far as everything else, I am doing all right. I have distance myself from him a lot. I been letting him call me and I been letting him make the first moves. I don't trust him. I know a relationship is based on trust and I am still yet with him. he invited me over to help him house sit, and I am going over there. I know he loves me, I know a lot of people don't believe me, when I say this, but I see it in his eyes when he looks at me, it's caring and loving. I believe he really trully loves me, but alcohol and drugs have a hold on him that causes his mood swings.
I have to have hope that he will change and that things will get better. I love him with all my heart. I remember all the choking and the throwing me across the room and the hitting me and kicking me, and degrading me and I think to myself what am I doing? why do I keep going back. But then I think of all the love and good times too. I feel his arms around me tenderly and lovingly. I feel his kisses and I just get all butterflies in my stomach and i feel like a teenager in love all over again. I want so bad for everything to work out for us.
It feels like we are starting all over again from the beginning. It is so fun at this moment. I hear it in my head, it will only last a little while, and I wonder what keeps me with him.
It's the fact that he supports me when I really need him. He is there helping me when I really need it. I see it as genuine care, and I see it as from the heart. I don't see any ulterior motives behind it, only that he loves me.
When we broke up he and I bought a truck together, and I know you guys heard this one, but I let him take it, and all his belongings, I kept nothing, there was a few belongings left behind, but I kept them for him so that they would be safe and in one piece if he ever decided to take them back. Well he didn't believe me, and when he asks for certain item, I go get it for him and I return it. He told me last night, "any other women would have just taking it and sold it, or gave it away, or said hell with him and he can get his own." even my own friends were like "go get that truck he can get his own" I said no "I bought that for him" They told me "your too nice for your own good."
I have a strong faith in Jesus, and I believe that to turn the other cheek, and I have, a lot of times I have done it too much, but I believe in Jesus and I know that he will provide for me whatever I need. And so far he has blessed me with a new truck a home and kids that love me unconditionally. I have a faith that he will take care of me when I am alone and I have been praying for him and I. That our relationship will go where Jesus sees fit.
I let him completely go and he came back on his own without my provacation. I didn't call him, see him, text him, fb him, nothing I just kept to myself all that time even though it was hell, I stayed away. I seemed to be making some progress. Now I hope him and I make progress together. I pray the ugly face of abuse doesn't show his face ever again. I know its a lot to ask, but I have a strong faith in Jesus.
I will continue to hope. Although this is our last chance at making happiness together. If this time it don't work, I will move on by myself. I am starting to have a little more self esteem to the fact that I don't feel like I NEED him. I will log more later, getting busy.