Violence...
Growing up, things happen to you, but they don't necessarily make you feel like you're a "victim". You just deal with things & work with the hand that you're dealt.
Today was different. We were all shoveling snow outside...everyone but my son, that is. There was a lot of it & we 3 were getting pretty tired. So my son finally shows up outside, my husband gives him an earful & my son makes his way to the end of the driveway, where we were all working.
He stands there & says, "what should I do?" I said, "Just scoop up the white fluffy stuff" as I scoop up some snow. I turn around & bam! He hit my back with the shovel. I turned around (to say something) and see my husband trying to grab my son's shovel. Then my son tries to hit my husband in the head. Then my husband completely lost his mind & started hitting my son with HIS shovel. All the while, I'm saying to my husband (calmly) to stop. And keeping the dog back so he doesn't get hurt.
Next thing I know, my neighbor from across the street (who I've never formally met--what a first impression, huh?) comes over & tells the 2 to calm down, settle down or he'll have to call the police. I don't remember my husband saying anything, but my son was like, "Stay out of it, it's none of your business!" to the neighbor.
Finally, my husband tells my son to go inside; we don't want his help now. The neighbor goes away. My daughter is in tears. I'm getting out my frustrations on the snow.
So what I want to know is: when the heck did I get this white trash family? This was not the man I married (who was known for his compassion with others) or the son that I raised. This was not the outcome I prayed for--quite the opposite!
As I furiously shoveled the snow, I thought, this is NOT how I want to live my life! I don't want to be a domestic violence victim! Yet my husband is so against dragging the police "into our business"; and even if he wasn't, what's to stop my son from lying & saying that I abuse him? Then by law, they have to give HIM the benefit of the doubt & I'll end up not just losing him, but my daughter as well.
It's a rock & a hard place. But I know one thing: I don't want to live lies anymore.
Today was different. We were all shoveling snow outside...everyone but my son, that is. There was a lot of it & we 3 were getting pretty tired. So my son finally shows up outside, my husband gives him an earful & my son makes his way to the end of the driveway, where we were all working.
He stands there & says, "what should I do?" I said, "Just scoop up the white fluffy stuff" as I scoop up some snow. I turn around & bam! He hit my back with the shovel. I turned around (to say something) and see my husband trying to grab my son's shovel. Then my son tries to hit my husband in the head. Then my husband completely lost his mind & started hitting my son with HIS shovel. All the while, I'm saying to my husband (calmly) to stop. And keeping the dog back so he doesn't get hurt.
Next thing I know, my neighbor from across the street (who I've never formally met--what a first impression, huh?) comes over & tells the 2 to calm down, settle down or he'll have to call the police. I don't remember my husband saying anything, but my son was like, "Stay out of it, it's none of your business!" to the neighbor.
Finally, my husband tells my son to go inside; we don't want his help now. The neighbor goes away. My daughter is in tears. I'm getting out my frustrations on the snow.
So what I want to know is: when the heck did I get this white trash family? This was not the man I married (who was known for his compassion with others) or the son that I raised. This was not the outcome I prayed for--quite the opposite!
As I furiously shoveled the snow, I thought, this is NOT how I want to live my life! I don't want to be a domestic violence victim! Yet my husband is so against dragging the police "into our business"; and even if he wasn't, what's to stop my son from lying & saying that I abuse him? Then by law, they have to give HIM the benefit of the doubt & I'll end up not just losing him, but my daughter as well.
It's a rock & a hard place. But I know one thing: I don't want to live lies anymore.
Replies