Very Little Sleep

I went to bed around midnight I guess,  I don't even know.  I woke up at 3:15 this morning and haven't slept since.  I laid awake, thought of those I love and have loved in my life.  I thought of those I have tried to reach out to, those I have tried to help and yes, also about those who have hurt me and rejected me.
I don't understand all of this.  I feel so incapable of dealing with all of these thoughts and memories running wild in my mind.  I feel like such a failure.  I feel so insignificant , so worthless, and yet, I still struggle through these bonds and try to help others.  I sometimes ask myself why.
I hope when my time comes, someone will have benefited from at least knowing me or knowing of me.

Replies

concettah
concettah

I had to up my med\'s cause I couldn\'t sleep either. I\'ve been blaming it on the change of seasons and the less hours of sunlight that are lowering my seritonin. You are a wonderful person from what I\'ve learned in church 24/7 . Please hold on and remember who\'s voice you might be listening to. Hugs, connie
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD

It sounds like the misery of depression talking Peewee..I have written in the last couple of journals and hope you will read it.. You need to get help sweetie... this isnt okay at all.. you sound as though you have fallen into a deep depression.. with anxiety.. you need medical treatment to help you onto the road of recover.. it will come.. the darkness will life and the light will shine again.. but for now please reach out for the help you need.. I dont think you would enjoy a trip right now at all... I think it would be another burden.. I hope you will think about cancelling it until you are starting to heal.. great big huge bear hug for the best guy ever..xx
deleted_user
deleted_user

You are precious to me..............
starbright1949
starbright1949

I heard a precher once say that God woke him up early as so no one wld disturb him, no phone or visitors cld this be your private time to reflect and study the word, and to think out your life? Time and Life are so precious, you are only given so much, don\'t waste them. Big Hugs~~~Debbie