Very Little Sleep

I went to bed around midnight I guess,  I don't even know.  I woke up at 3:15 this morning and haven't slept since.  I laid awake, thought of those I love and have loved in my life.  I thought of those I have tried to reach out to, those I have tried to help and yes, also about those who have hurt me and rejected me.
I don't understand all of this.  I feel so incapable of dealing with all of these thoughts and memories running wild in my mind.  I feel like such a failure.  I feel so insignificant , so worthless, and yet, I still struggle through these bonds and try to help others.  I sometimes ask myself why.
I hope when my time comes, someone will have benefited from at least knowing me or knowing of me.