Valium

I cant deal with this pain. Knowing he's hers and he will never be mine again. I have been taking Valium to help me at night. I need more help. I need to feel numb. I dont want to feel anything. This hurts so badly. I feel like saying the speech from Grey's Anatomy to him 
"Meredith: I lied. I'm not...out...of this relationship. I'm in. I'm so in, it's humiliating, because here I am, begging-- Meredith: OK, Here it is. Your choice, it's simple. Her or me. And I'm sure she's really great. But Derek...I love you. In a really, really big...pretend to like your taste in music. Let you eat the last piece of cheesecake. Hold a radio over my head outside your bedroom window. Unfortunate way that also makes me hate you...love you. So pick me. Choose me. Love me. "
 
Yea but i know who he would pick. Her...cause he already did. 
 
I lost the love of my life and my best friend. I dont know what to do. He wants me to be ok with it and go back to being his friend but I dont think I ever can. 

Replies

twlight8
twlight8

he could be terribly confused.... relationships can be so confusing at times and breakup\'s do occur.... but if you two are best friends... and have a history.... don\'t give up just yet.... go easy on the valium too. It can lead to an addiction.... talk to someone you trust to counsel you.... take care of yourself..... so you can be ready to talk to him when the times comes. He may realize he made the biggest mistake of his life.
LavenderLove
LavenderLove

Well he got engaged..after 3 months of meeting this girl she is his fiance...