Update on the parents....
if you are just reading this, read the previous entry for more info. i spoke with his mother in depth. and things went rather well. i feel better, but at the same time this opened up a whole new chapter in things. they did speak with him, and he had nothing but bad things to say about me, even went as low to say that i stole his money to buy drugs, and that is why he left me, that the baby probably isnt his, and even had the nerve to bring my little brother into this, saying he is a thief, while true and i hope he learns from his mistakes, but ... saying that i was helping my brother steal and harboring stolen goods. oof, the lies. he brought up the police report that was filed, all these negative things that i wasnt even going to address. i was simply opening a line of communication, with nothing negative to say. she asked me about all this. i explained myself. she did not know i was pregnant, or that i had had a miscarriage, or that me and him were even living together. i explained, calmly that while i have my flaws, i am not perfect but i am NOT a drug addict by far, and that to even have a gambling license to work in casinos, they do a VERY extensive background check. he tried to say that i couldnt handle him and the military life, and his mother was shocked to learn that i had been in the army myself, and come from a navy family, and that i understand well the woes of the military. basically he tried to make me look like a scumbag. i knew he lied, but i never knew he would stoop that low to say those things. I told her that time is getting close to when the baby is due, and i needed to find out some things for myself, that i was sorry to call and "drop the bomb" like this, but i had no idea that they didnt know. she does want a paternity test result, of course, i mean, i dont blame her, she doesnt know me. but she was kind and respectful, and seemed apalled to learn that he left me after he knew i was pregnant. he was making it sound like he didnt know till after he broke up with me. i did not badmouth him. i told her that while i was angry about things that had happened, i was not over the top about it, and i dont believe he was being malicious or a liar, just that he was immature, and she agreed that he had always had immaturity issues. she said that when the results do come back as his, then she does want to be in the baby's life. she says i sound like i have a decent head on my shoulders, and that i was very brave to do what i had done in calling her and is glad i did. i told her i was scared to death, but i needed to know. he had also told her i wasnt working and incapable of taking care of myself. i told her i was sick, and i couldnt work a normal job then, and now im back on track and working and looking at college now that i am healthy again. she told me to just take care of myself and the baby. i gave her my number and e mail so if she had any further questions. i was surprised at how little she knew, and how much i found out. and she was nice for the most part. i didnt feel like i was being belittled, just that she wanted info. and i was more than happy to give it to her, even negative information about me. and im proud of myself for keeping calm, cause i refused to badmouth him. He can go there if he wants, but all will be told soon, i cant afford to be the immature one and point fingers. and he IS the one who lied, and did not tell his parents about this all. he could have been a man, and stood up, and said at least, hey this girl is pregnant and thinks its mine from the get go. maybe now this will be a reality check. maybe he will learn this is not going away. he can make lies in his head all he wants about me cheating on him. but it never happened. i know that with all my secrets and to the depths of my heart. and so does he in the end. and when the paternity test comes back sure, they will know i am true to my word, and am not the lying theiving crazy drug addict he made me out to be. i think that she saw today at least, that i do have a brain, and she spoke to me as such. so i feel better..... a little, im quite pissed off about what he said about me, but thats his immaturity... lie lie lie. so on to the next chapter. at least i know that my daughter has a chance to be loved by his family, if not by him.
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