Update
It is 3:30 am. I woke up at 1:30 and could not go back to sleep. I logged on to FB and had a message from one a nurse who worked on my unit many years ago. She had a wonderful way with the elderly. Anyway, we keep in touch on FB. She told me that her husband has been diagnosed with ALS and is going downhill quite quickly.
I am beginning to think that my purpose in life is to be with those who are experiencing loss. I feel very comfortable being supportive. Jack is still with us. I have spent every afternoon for the last 2 weeks with him and Leslie - and will continue to do so until they kick me out or Jack dies.
Jack is going to a hospice tomorrow. The hospital is a dreadful place to die.
Once they stopped the treatment, Jack perked up. He looks skeletal but has long periods of lucidity. He is getting annoyed that it is taking so long. I am totally surprised that he is still here! He is living on sips of beer and wine - perhaps it is what is keeping him alive! He reminds me almost daily to take care of Leslie once he is gone. We have reminisced, laughed, disagreed at times, but have had the opportunity to say good bye. It is not often that one can laugh about dying - with someone who is dying! But that is Jack. I will miss him.
Replies
I read, and then posted to my own FB page, a quote that said: LIFE PLACES YOUR PURPOSE RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR DEEPEST WOUND. I believe this is why (for those who seek and wish to live into their purpose) people, like YOU, have the gift of being with those who are transitioning, and those who love and are walking beside those who are transitioning. I believe your deepest wound has magnified and multiplied your innate ability to be in loving companionship with others. That's certainly what you are doing for Jack and Leslie....and certainly what you have, and continue to do, for myself and SO many other FMO moms.
Someone (shockingly an FMO mom) once said to me, "How can you call yourself a friend? How can you talk and laugh about Barbara's cancer and her dying? That is not what a friend does." First of all, I was shocked that she was so bold as to tell me I was not a true friend to Barbara, and secondly, she did not experience OUR friendship....no one did other than Barbara and myself....so how the hell would she know what kind of friendship we had!! Needless to say, we aren't fans of each other, LOL!
I think it's MARVELOUS and SPECIAL and yes, even NEEDED, for you and Jack and Leslie to be able to laugh and talk straight with each other!!! I think it's one of the best gifts you can give.....and receive.....to/from someone who is in transition. So major kudos to you all for being so REAL!
Thank you for sharing and for caring and for loving so beautifully!!!
You found a special talent and I thinks it's awsome how you can help others. You are a blessing to so many. Love You
Hugs and love…I’ve felt like the death expert at times too…hate it.
What a wonderful tribute to Jack. Living on our death bed, that is a precious gift.
Thinking of you with heartfelt hugs.
Maybe your right and I had not thought of our walk being with the broken. But as I reflect since Brett leaving this side, I have sat with the broken. It really is a very easy thing for me now. Will ponder on your beautiful words.
Hug's