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Hey there everyone, yet again it is time for me to enter my thoughts into a journal entry that maybe 4 or 5 people will read. /sigh. Ive been battling harder than ever with depression lately. IVe been trying to keep my head up and keep going, but it seems to get harder and harder the longer I try to push through it. I have been trying to just keep myself busy in the meantime. I dragged out my bags of megabloks and put them together to make a little livingroom based well... for lack of better word... fort. Even has a little doorway and everything. Ive also started back to cooking regularly too. I love to cook, but I hate dishes, so I cook, and then do dishes a few days later. Seems like the perfect compromise. Ive also recently made a picture for my dad's room. I sketched out a beach scene, and then colored it in, so that my dads room will now have some art work in it. Ive seemed to really be in an artistic/depressed/moody kinda feeling these past few days, but I feel so damned alone. My dad is always with his gf, and I dont know what to say to him when he IS around, plus, My friends are dwindling, because there are fewer and fewer people I trust to be around. Not only that, but Ty seems to be my only company and he likes his quiet.... I don't blame him, but... I'm going crazy here. Ive also tried to spend some more time with his mother. She loves me to death, and I love her more than my own mother. So I have tried to go over there as much as possible, and hang out with her, keep her company, help her decorate everything up for the Christmas season, and just try my hardest to distract myself from my lonely feelings. Ive also recently gotten an ego boost... I went to a tree lot and asked them for their cut off branches, and they were all so nice, and helped me out, but what I didnt realize is they apparently liked how I looked when asking for their branches. LoL. Anyway... I look forward to any and all comments I might get on this one. Merry Christmas all. -Jenn
Replies
Hey Sweetie sorry to read you are so down. If you care to vent or use me as a sounding board, or just chat hit me up.
art is a great way for expression - the fort sounds interesting
sounds like you are doing a good job trying to battle the depression. you arent letting it win
i been battling depression too alot, becuase of the cold and other things i got me a treadmill though so i can go walking still inside tis not the same though not being able to be around nature, but im okay. oh jen your fort, omg that is so cute and artistic adorable and awesome too. wow.
i used to love to play wiht megablocks with mydaughter and kids i would babysit omg we would have a godo time doing that ha we did boats too. was great times. you sketch wow, i also did beach scene while back. wow you are really talented i bet all that you do is so beautiful just like you... :)
i mean that and merry christmas i wish i could write like you do, pouring yoru heart out like you... aaah you are great, still an angel to me
hugggies
I\'M READING YOUR JOURNAL AND YOU ARE DOING WELL AND MAKING ALL THE RIGHT CHOICES TO KEEP YOU FROM SLIPPING FURTHER INTO DEPRESSION. KEEP THIS UP AND YOU WILL TURN AROUND. I KNOW BECAUSE I\'VE BEEN DOING THE SAME THING FOR ABOUT SIX WEEKS AND I AM COMING AROUND, I CAN SEE THE LIGHT. TAKE CARE. DEBBIE
Hey! This wasn\'t a long entry at all :) It\'s good to keep yourself distracted and busy with odd and ends. I have managed to keep myself busy today, but it only lasts for so long, ya know. Like I baked cookies, downloaded FireFox, got up around 12:30 (specifically to make my day shorter), did DePhoMo on Open diary, made my bed....Yeah that\'s pretty much it. Some days are busier than others. I dont know. I hope we can still talk online sometime.