Update
Okay. I haven't been here for a while so I figured I needed to update. I am doing much better now in dealing with the divorce. I think my ex has lost his new gf, because he has been home a little more and sad when I talk to him. He went out of town for a couple of days for military drilll and to visit his family. He told me I could stay at the house if I wanted. That seems a little creepy since he has had his gf there. There is still a picture of us on our wedding day on top of the refrigerator, but I noticed that he turned it to the side. I guess it made her feel uncomfortable, but he is not yet ready to just take it down altogether. I guess that helps me to feel a little better. I think about how much I miss him, but I think that I want children more than I want him back. Maybe this is a sign that I am coming to terms with loving him but knowing he is not the right person at this point in my life.
Replies
Okay. It has been almost two months since I have been here, and a lot has changed for me. I moved to Jacksonville at the first of May and have been back and forth to Panama City area since. On a cople of occasions, I stayed at my ex\'s house so I could hang out with the dog. He no longer has his gf and is realizing that he really messed up without me. I did get an apology for the way he handled things. I just about fell on the floor. But he still drinks, and he tried to get in the bed with me on several occasions. I did a miraculous job of saying no and that I was just not in to the whole \"recreational/casual sex\" thing, and, in the process, I feel like I gained a lot more confidence and strength. I still love him, but I am not in the market for a casual relationship. That is just not who I am. Anyway, I am here with my \"roommate\" now, and I feel very happy and content to be with him. However, I just found out that I need neck/back surgery so I guess life still sucks for me.