Unsent Letter

Dear DadI love you Dad but I don't love the fact that you drink and it didn't help our family. It affected me and I decided that my family would not be affected by drinking so I guess that is one reason we don't come around as much as you want us to. I taught my kids that drinking can ruin a family and can affect you for a long time and so far my kids are into other things and not into drinking. I know I drunk when they were small but when I started showing signs of drinking affecting their lives then I turn away from the bottle. Dad I know its your decision about drinking but sometimes I feel you don't care how it affects others you just care about you. Sharon is the same way. You want to be part of my life but you don't want to at the same time and it don't make sense to me.You can drink but I rather you not when I visit especially when Alex is with me. Kids are special and they need not know about alcoholic until they are older he has enough going on his life already. He's a teenager and thats hard enough. My friend Rhonda is a good friend and I didn't appreciate you telling me I didn't take care of my family when I invited her into my home. You had no right to tell me that after what you did to your family with your drinking and going to bars and wrecking all the time when we were small. Me and the boys knew every bar in the county when we were little and we thought that was cool or was it. We pour you liquor out of your bottles and put water in the bottle because we didn't want you to drink. We took your beer cans and drunk the little bit of beer left in the can. We wanted to be like dad. I wanted to be daddy's little girl and sometime I was and sometime your alcohol was more important. We had good times when we were kids but there were alot of bad times to. My friend Rhonda has had bad times to and I'm her friend and she's been here for me and she don't turn her back on me not like some people. Not talking to me for letting her stay with me was mean dad and I was very upset and pissed. I don't like your drinking and not buying a gift for alex and buying beer was wrong. Christmas is for kids anyway its okay for adults but kids come first. I bought alex gifts and joey and anthony and nikki gifts before I would buy me a gift or adult a gift because they are important to me and more kid like to me. Even though they are adults they are still my kids. So dad I have written this to tell you how I feel. Drinking is something everyone makes a decision on and it is genetic but it stops with me in the family maybe one of my brothers will drink but not me. I pray my kids listen to me and keep away from it they saw me go through the hospital twice and I tell them that alcohol hurts a family and them. There is enough stress to go through now days to add alchohol to the stress. Finances is our big problem now but then I tell my kids as long as we stick together and stick with God then we can do anything. God has brought me through a lot so I'm not giving up now.So Dad to end this letter I love you and nothing will change that and I love Sharon but I don't love some of your actions. Maybe some day it will change but for now lets leave it as it is and I will call every once in awhile and come see you at Thanksgiving and Christmas with Rhonda and Alex. I will love you always and Pray for you and one day things may change if you want them to. I understand sicknes dad I there and been there for a long time. I understand cancer been there to. I understand depression been there to but until you decide to talk and want to change I can't do nothing. So dad until next time I love you. LoveRobin