I'm posting this here as a reminder. I guess I wrote this while in my blacked out space during my suicide attempt.
I took 120mg of ambien roughly, wine, beer and cymbalta and totally blacked out. I have no memory after that. But I have since found a ton of writings on my computer, tumblr, facebook, and messages sent to a friend about it. I guess I'm more fucked up than I thought.

Im reaching out, but nothing is there
the night air is silent and empty
Nothing to grasp, nothing to stop me
Im tired of reaching and grasping nothing

Do you even care?
Your eyes tell me my worth
Im the burden choking you
Your the burden holding me down

My lungs are heavy and I cant breathe
chest to chest, you're taking away my breath
Ive lost my ability
To know and love who I am

You stole it away
and tossed away the key