unimportant......

i feel so unimportant...... my brother called today and i read the comics, drank some water and he was still on the phone with my parents, so i went in the living room and sat in the chair listening to him talking.....and they were talking about loans for his schooling and stuff and i just sat there listening....i miss my brother just as much as my paretns!!! it's my right to listen to their conversation.....i miss him, too!!!! well, my mom said,"you don't hafta stay here and listen, val..." i got the hint, but stayed anyway.....well eventually my mom said,"val, go away...we need some privacy.." why is it, that when it comes to my brother, i'm suddenly not important....and i wanna cut....i think i might.....i'll do my homework and then see what works.....i should probably contact the on-call therapist.....but i don't care anymore.....i just wanna feel important....cutting will make all the pdressed feelings go away....i feel like crying too....maybe cutting will make the tears come out, too.....i dunno....