u know what i hate?

i hate it when i person tells me You know lifes not perfect.i of all people know that with all the shit ive been throughi hate it when i person cant trust me because of one small thing i said to another person that wont harm the first personi hate it when a friend complains about their life but doesnt tell me whats going oni hate it that no one can see the pain im going throughi put up a pic on a different site and ppl told me i looked sad in my eyes like something deep happend to me or im hiding somethinga person can tell that over the internet but not in person?i hate it when a friend purposely pushes me over the edge and even admits it- then again i respect that they admited iti hate the damn secrets i have to hidebut i guess im kinda hypocritical cuz i hate it when someone hides something from mei hate when people ignore me because im not good enoughi hate how i feel insidei hate how i cry myself to sleep almost every nighti hate not knowing how things are going to be tomorrowi hate that my love for music is slipping awayi hate how nothing is touching me anymorei hate that im scaredi hate that i cant just be happyi hate that i cant just let the whole world know how i feeli hate that i want to hide my secrets but i want to tell them at the same timei hate that i have to have these stupid secretsi hate all this stressi hate that i cant believe in myself no matter what i do.i hate that no one can understand how something as simple as a dot (.)can mean sooo much to a personi hate pain and wari hate not having supportive friendsi hate the way i looki hate that my sister hates mei hate that my dad is in floridai hate that in a way im glad he isi hate how my heart is pounding and then i literally feel it completely stopi hate it feels like my heart is ripping aparti hate how i dont have true friend.i especially hate the nightmares