Two years approaching

Daer Roger In one month and 3 days you will have been gone from this earth for TWO whole years. I say that in amazement that much time has gone and yet there are times in my psychic it seems just a short while ago you left. I still take moments to stop what I am doing and say "I can not believe you died. " Just saying that makes it so final yet I still say it as if to convince myself it is. I honestly thought by now I would be moved into a small place with less work, and better potential to move into a better life style. Not so much work, more financial security, etc. etc. a better opportunity to get out amongst people more.... I am not sure what God has in plan for me but I do feel like he is not cooperating... OR can a GOD really give you what you ask - I have been trying to get there myself but road blocks etc styme my efforts.
Now Ike is coughing - not super bad but enough I need to take him to VET and Spot still has sore feet I think because he got into grass....I need to get fencing done but can not do it on my own. Donnie was to help me but now his MOM with her issues....She is half faking to get attention we know but half not: she won't listen to taking meds correctly got to taking whatever when messed herself badly ended up in hospital needs to live with some help but getting her there and keeping her there is a problem.  She's to go into Good Samitarian medical center for rehab in helping her get stronger, and get her meds correctly but she insist shes not staying but she can not live alone, she can not live with Donnie and Candy can not take her so where does she go?  Probably back to apt where she believes everyone is out to get her & has hallucinations so bad cops were called.  SO poor Donnie with his mom, I so feel for him.  He is a good husband to Cassie, but its wearing on them.  SO sad, wish someone would get her into some place to take care of her. 
Its only 58 here, Colorado Springs where your brother lives is under fire - his base is evacuating...I hope his place is safe.  I  heard Grand Junction was even 102 the other day - but your Mom does not go out of her bed anymore I hear - so sad she wants to leave this earth at age 96 but does not go.  Yet you left at 68 ...you wonder why?
Cuddles, she is working out so well, Chelsea & her get along so well...20 lbs vs 60lbs but it works.  And she brings some cuddles to me, Chelsea tries too but just not a lap dog but sure makes me feel secure. 
Health care insurance guy called - trying to find some insurance for me but until I can work pt just can not afford it...hope nothing  happens for next 3 yrs...but if it does it does I am sick of worrying about it.
Wish someone would love our place yet I am afraid of where I will end up next also.  SIGH  Darn wish you could send me a sign....sure could use it....