Turns Out I Wasn't Ready

Well, moving on from my last journal entry, I attended my first day at my new job. I had the normal first day nerves that any normal person would have. I drove around the city of London, delivered and collected some stuff and returned to base. All in all a good day.
 
I then went today and as soon as I arrived my day was changed. What I thought was happening had been altered. That instantly put me on edge and got me all anxious. Somebody then turned around and made the good point that I needed some better footwear. It wasn't malicious or offensive in any way but it instantly made me think that I was a complete loser. I wasn't fit for the job.
 
I then looked for some excuse to leave. 'Oh I have boots in my car, let me get them and I'll be right back'. I then left, got in my car. Shuffled below the level of the dash for five minutes, started the engine when I thought it was safe and drove home breaking the speed limit by at least double the whole way.
 
I don't know why, I just couldn't handle it. It completely spun me out.
 
Just got back from seeing the doctor and they finally have my medical records from my last doctor. It only took two months. He said he'll have a look through and see me again next week when maybe he can prescribe some meds.
 
I just want to be normal again and make my girl proud to be with me.
 
Peace and Love.