Trying to be my own Person yet being part of a committed relationship
A couple of days ago, I had a major freeze not being able to do what I had outlined as my chores before some people came over to put in a new floor. After being to class for depression, I had thought my days of freezing were over so I took this freeze very hard as did my husband (he thought the class was suppose to make me well. To Fix me!). I knew in my head that some things were going to still happen until I work through them and survive out the other end but I this was what felt so down and degraded (I always feel degraded like I am not pulling my weight and I need to. That is my reality! However, my irrational thoughts always beat me up making me feel like I'm nothing when I know that God does NOT make "Nothings" for His glory. I may not be a light to everyone but I can be a light here on daily strength and I know that some of you also struggle with freezing.
My son told me that I taught him how to work out of a freeze when he was a kid. He said that you always start with one small corner that is 1 foot by 1 foot and you clean that one area. You praise yourself and let yourself feel the accomplishment that that small accomplishment. Then you work on the next 1 foot by 1 foot area and keep redoing the cleaning over and over an over until you unfreeze, it gets easier, etc. It is very weird that he remembered how I taught him how I learned to clean house but I had never related it to "freezes" even though I remembered freezing when I was working through it as a young bride.
I can now visualize the steps but the reward at the end of the trial must be worth it either positive or negative. In my case as a young bride, the goal was my husband thinking well of me. In my case of having people in to put in a new floor, well, I survived it, I had already moved everything out of their way but I wanted to get the house cleaned up as well so they had a good opinion of me. I did not have them having a good opinion of me as a person that cleaned house well but at least I was welcoming.
I think not freezing is going to take a lot of practice and sometimes I will win and sometimes I will loose but what is more important is that I'm keeping working on it.
My son told me that I taught him how to work out of a freeze when he was a kid. He said that you always start with one small corner that is 1 foot by 1 foot and you clean that one area. You praise yourself and let yourself feel the accomplishment that that small accomplishment. Then you work on the next 1 foot by 1 foot area and keep redoing the cleaning over and over an over until you unfreeze, it gets easier, etc. It is very weird that he remembered how I taught him how I learned to clean house but I had never related it to "freezes" even though I remembered freezing when I was working through it as a young bride.
I can now visualize the steps but the reward at the end of the trial must be worth it either positive or negative. In my case as a young bride, the goal was my husband thinking well of me. In my case of having people in to put in a new floor, well, I survived it, I had already moved everything out of their way but I wanted to get the house cleaned up as well so they had a good opinion of me. I did not have them having a good opinion of me as a person that cleaned house well but at least I was welcoming.
I think not freezing is going to take a lot of practice and sometimes I will win and sometimes I will loose but what is more important is that I'm keeping working on it.
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I suffer from the same only my mom is in a personal care home . The aids talk the go to the supervisor and say I never said what they tell . I never leavethere with out being soakin wetwith anxietysocal .can you help me I hate sweating I take klonopin and also paxiland norco for arthritis. Thanks my friend , Brenda Sue