Trying

I was hoping to wake up refreshed today from a long week of design projects and 25 hours of school in 3 days. But I woke up every hour last night. Not sure why. I've decided I'm going to be a meteorologist. I can tell if the rain is coming because there's always a certain spot on my side that hurts more than the others. Its kind of funny, actually. I feel better emotionally today, though I'm exhausted. I'm thankful for this. I'll take what I can get. All day yesterday I spent hours on a packaging design I had done, and it was funny to me when my teacher announced that I was an over-achiever. I found it hilarious. Because I don't see myself excelling, I guess because most of the thoughts I have about my life is the fact that I'm in pain. But I do need to start being the other half of me that isn't just pain. I need to recognize that I'm a person, and not just someone in pain. I think if you lose that, there's nothing to strive for. After all, its impossible to breathe without hurting, but I did make it on the Dean's List last quarter for my GPA. I sometimes forget that I'm just like everyone else and when I succeed, it reassures everything I'm working towards. I'm thankful I have a future and I'm thankful that I can do all that I can do, with pain as my shadow. Don't ever let pain define the person you are. You'll lose yourself.