Troubled Heart
Stopped over to the house Thur. to stay with my son while the STBX is out of town for training. Funny I go from being Charlie Manson to an excellent babysitter in less that a month. I'm waiting in the truck as the no contact order states until she leaves before I get out. She is waiting outside her car for me to get out and I finally had to say YOU have to leave before I can get out of the truck. Petty I know but SHE brought this on not me. I get out and give the boy a hug walk into the house and it just smells like dog piss, she has all my stuff boxed up sitting in the family room, hardly any food in the house. I was really upset but I held it together and just kept going. I look at the boy and he's just really upest. He says I don't like mom's friend, that really hurt because he's just miserable. After we had dinner at the couples house where I've been staying and got cleaned up we crawl into bed to watch a little tv. He starts crying out of the blue, and says " Mom's friend is going to be with her the whole time". I'm trying my best not to just break down, can't say I didn't cry but at least I wasn't hysterical. I just kept telling him that no matter what I loved him. No matter where they ended up I was always going to love him and he was the most important thing in my life. He just put his arm around me and said I love you. No matter how much my heart is breaking with my wife leaving I have to say that having my son's love is the greatest gift God could ever give me.
Replies
OMG! Scott, I cannot stand to read this and see you and your son hurting sooo much, especially your son. I know I ache for my two boys and they have NO CLUE, yet, but your son sounds old enough to grasp what is going on and to be going on in the future. SHE should see what she has done to your boy. Although selfish idiots never care enough for anyone but themselves so I don\'t think she\'d actually give two shits. I\'m here for you and you have been for me to give support and help you thru this. You are right..your kids\' love is the greatest gift God could ever give and hope they will know someday what real love is from a parent. Sorry to hear you are going thru this all.
--L
Wow, wow. I am so sorry. This is awful and I feel for you so much. You\'re doing all the right things. Continue to focus on your son and what you can do for him--that\'s all you can do right now. Lots of hugs to you.
Scott, your screenname got me to contact you the first time. Real men cry with their sons. Real men are angry, but gentle. Real men do what is right, even when it feel like Hell with claws. Real men know that the only way out is THROUGH. And, like you, real man, they do it mostly by instinct with occasional reminders. It is a sorry world we live in, but we, ourselves, are not sorry. I see into your eyes, and they reflect back a hero. Only the eyes of a true man feflect that back to another true man. Count me as a willing supporter, and love that son as if your life depends on it, because IT DOES!
I can only say that I am truly humbled and brought to tears by the support you folks have given me. I pray that God will keep all of you in his healing grace. Thanks Scott
Your are such a great dad, Scott. And I am sure your son knows that even now young as he is. I wish there was something I could do to ease your pain. I will say a prayer for you and your son tonight, Scott. I think your son is incredibly blessed to have a father like you. You are a good man and never lose sight of that. Hugs.