Transformation
Second Week
I just had the second meeting on Prosperity and Transformation and I feel so amazing. I took a deep relaxing bath with the bath salts and EO that hannah gave me and it reminded me that you can give in any way, even small ways and it makes a big difference. She gave beans to everyone and got joy from the fact that everyone enjoyed it. She gave treats that her sister had given her from another country selflessly. She really is leading by example. I know that in the past I would not share rare treats for fear that they would all be eaten. She even gave in terms of cleaning her house and "scrubbing the floors" as her mother had said. I now see how cleaning personal space for the comfort of others is an act of giving. I have in the past had countless complaints from my aunt about me being lazy and how if I don't clean and continue to be sloppy no man will ever want to marry me. This (if you see my room right now), obviously did not make me want to clean. It just made me feel worthless and resentful. As a way to rebel I refused to clean or help out around the house. That manifested itself into turning me into an actually very selfish person. Perhaps the karma of not giving myself in that way also aided in my development of my neuromuscular disease in which i physically found it difficult to do household chores because of how fatigued I was.
After watching Hannah give of herself in so many ways I am inspired to do the same. I want to clean. As we saw in class I WANT TO HELP, I also reflect on all when things that my grandmother does and I realize she also leads by example in many ways. She has given in many ways to me. I was reminded of how Hannah made breakfast for her mother in the morning. Then I remembered how my grandmother made me Sausage in the morning. I had not thought of it as an act of giving and I realized I therefore had not felt gratitude for it. I am thankful to have a grandmother who is able to get around and cook me breakfast. I also need to show her my gratitude because I now see the joy that can be given from showing appreciation. I felt this this morning when I gave a man standing in the cold a ten dollar bill. He said to me "I don't know who you are but god bless your soul". Ironically the first thing we did in class was a soul meditation. This is the second class where I have given before going to class and this is the most money I have ever given away to a stranger at once. I could tell he appreciated it and i felt gratitude for his appreciation and his blessing.
Note- Vivi Macedo (ep.4 deepak chopra 30 days intent), Watsu (water shiatsu massage), like being cradeled by mom, being held w. unconditional love"- I had this sensation when taking a bath. I felt cleansing as well. I washed away my worries and was at peace. I kept refilling the tub when it got warm and I knew thats what I needed. I am learning how to trust my own instinct. I had the sensation that I had the answers and thought of whitney houstens "i'm every woman, its all in me". I am feeling like I know right from wrong and I no longer need to rely solely on spiritual teachers because I have the answers within and the divine is showing them to me. I am learning to guide myself.
ep 1
intention, desire, will, destiny
Intents are not goals, they come from our soul, asking ourselves what do we want find in our lives that give us meaning and purpose?
Me- I want to help
Purity, Peace, Fullest Postential, Serve others and help the reach their fullest potential
ep 2
If you can truly embrace the uncomfortable, you can do anything- holly perkins (this reminds me of how uncomfortable cleaning, working out, creating/writing is, yet if I embrace these feelings I can achieve anything.
Release Insecurity
Focus on being rather than doing, Intent rather than accomplishments (soccor player)
Weel 3 water quote
- donate 200 more
First Week
I started the week of strong with giving and as my bank account went down I started to feel depressed. I prayed and a miracle came in the mail. I received an unexpected refund check even though I graduated over a year ago. It was enough to cover my entire credit card (although i have not decided/done this yet). I realized that this blessing came from my giving. It showed me that just as K said I can give without fear and it will be okay. I felt truly blessed and witnessing this re-energized me to keep working and giving. I have to give 10 percent away and this amount is way more than I have ever given away. The funny thing is that I actually don't feel anxious about doing it or that I don't want to. I truly feel overfilled with abundance and it feels good to give.
There are still many things to work on and I am not officially employed but I feel good and I realize this may be what i need to do. I have a lot of healing to do and if not being at work helps that, then that is a good thing.
I just had the second meeting on Prosperity and Transformation and I feel so amazing. I took a deep relaxing bath with the bath salts and EO that hannah gave me and it reminded me that you can give in any way, even small ways and it makes a big difference. She gave beans to everyone and got joy from the fact that everyone enjoyed it. She gave treats that her sister had given her from another country selflessly. She really is leading by example. I know that in the past I would not share rare treats for fear that they would all be eaten. She even gave in terms of cleaning her house and "scrubbing the floors" as her mother had said. I now see how cleaning personal space for the comfort of others is an act of giving. I have in the past had countless complaints from my aunt about me being lazy and how if I don't clean and continue to be sloppy no man will ever want to marry me. This (if you see my room right now), obviously did not make me want to clean. It just made me feel worthless and resentful. As a way to rebel I refused to clean or help out around the house. That manifested itself into turning me into an actually very selfish person. Perhaps the karma of not giving myself in that way also aided in my development of my neuromuscular disease in which i physically found it difficult to do household chores because of how fatigued I was.
After watching Hannah give of herself in so many ways I am inspired to do the same. I want to clean. As we saw in class I WANT TO HELP, I also reflect on all when things that my grandmother does and I realize she also leads by example in many ways. She has given in many ways to me. I was reminded of how Hannah made breakfast for her mother in the morning. Then I remembered how my grandmother made me Sausage in the morning. I had not thought of it as an act of giving and I realized I therefore had not felt gratitude for it. I am thankful to have a grandmother who is able to get around and cook me breakfast. I also need to show her my gratitude because I now see the joy that can be given from showing appreciation. I felt this this morning when I gave a man standing in the cold a ten dollar bill. He said to me "I don't know who you are but god bless your soul". Ironically the first thing we did in class was a soul meditation. This is the second class where I have given before going to class and this is the most money I have ever given away to a stranger at once. I could tell he appreciated it and i felt gratitude for his appreciation and his blessing.
Note- Vivi Macedo (ep.4 deepak chopra 30 days intent), Watsu (water shiatsu massage), like being cradeled by mom, being held w. unconditional love"- I had this sensation when taking a bath. I felt cleansing as well. I washed away my worries and was at peace. I kept refilling the tub when it got warm and I knew thats what I needed. I am learning how to trust my own instinct. I had the sensation that I had the answers and thought of whitney houstens "i'm every woman, its all in me". I am feeling like I know right from wrong and I no longer need to rely solely on spiritual teachers because I have the answers within and the divine is showing them to me. I am learning to guide myself.
ep 1
intention, desire, will, destiny
Intents are not goals, they come from our soul, asking ourselves what do we want find in our lives that give us meaning and purpose?
Me- I want to help
Purity, Peace, Fullest Postential, Serve others and help the reach their fullest potential
ep 2
If you can truly embrace the uncomfortable, you can do anything- holly perkins (this reminds me of how uncomfortable cleaning, working out, creating/writing is, yet if I embrace these feelings I can achieve anything.
Release Insecurity
Focus on being rather than doing, Intent rather than accomplishments (soccor player)
Weel 3 water quote
- donate 200 more
First Week
I started the week of strong with giving and as my bank account went down I started to feel depressed. I prayed and a miracle came in the mail. I received an unexpected refund check even though I graduated over a year ago. It was enough to cover my entire credit card (although i have not decided/done this yet). I realized that this blessing came from my giving. It showed me that just as K said I can give without fear and it will be okay. I felt truly blessed and witnessing this re-energized me to keep working and giving. I have to give 10 percent away and this amount is way more than I have ever given away. The funny thing is that I actually don't feel anxious about doing it or that I don't want to. I truly feel overfilled with abundance and it feels good to give.
There are still many things to work on and I am not officially employed but I feel good and I realize this may be what i need to do. I have a lot of healing to do and if not being at work helps that, then that is a good thing.
Replies