Transfer Day
I know that I should be excited.
All I feel is hurt. I mentioned in a previous post a friend who had said to me "thank God that's over, now I have my friend back"..that was after I had IVF and got pregnant. I guess that should have been a warning sign-but I was too stupid and trusting. So the same friend has literally dropped me like a sack of hot shit ever since I told her about the cancer. I had surgery on Friday night, she said that she would come and see me over the weekend...she didn't, she made some excuse on both days. Then, her and her husband were supposed to come around for dinner on Friday night-but she has already bailed stating she is too busy. I am pretty hurt. I know it is petty, but I honestly thought that we were good friends...but I guess not. I want to call her our on it but today is the transfer day and quite frankly, I need to not have any stress in my life right now. So I just have to pretend that all is fine.
Ok, I guess this is one of those times that I have to suck it up put on my big girls pants and move on...or as I said before tie your hair in a bun, drink some coffee, put on some gangsta rap and get on with it!!
So, I am going to try and conjure up some positive vibes and focus on a positive pregnancy result and a negative cancer one. Deep breaths and positive vibes....
Actually, I just have to realise that it is her problem, obviously, there is something about me now that she feels uncomfortable about. I just have to take pride in the fact that I am a good friend. I stand by my people though good and bad times. So yeah, I just have to have faith in my friendships and in myself. I am totally comfortable with who I am as a friend. I just have to hold onto that.
All I feel is hurt. I mentioned in a previous post a friend who had said to me "thank God that's over, now I have my friend back"..that was after I had IVF and got pregnant. I guess that should have been a warning sign-but I was too stupid and trusting. So the same friend has literally dropped me like a sack of hot shit ever since I told her about the cancer. I had surgery on Friday night, she said that she would come and see me over the weekend...she didn't, she made some excuse on both days. Then, her and her husband were supposed to come around for dinner on Friday night-but she has already bailed stating she is too busy. I am pretty hurt. I know it is petty, but I honestly thought that we were good friends...but I guess not. I want to call her our on it but today is the transfer day and quite frankly, I need to not have any stress in my life right now. So I just have to pretend that all is fine.
Ok, I guess this is one of those times that I have to suck it up put on my big girls pants and move on...or as I said before tie your hair in a bun, drink some coffee, put on some gangsta rap and get on with it!!
So, I am going to try and conjure up some positive vibes and focus on a positive pregnancy result and a negative cancer one. Deep breaths and positive vibes....
Actually, I just have to realise that it is her problem, obviously, there is something about me now that she feels uncomfortable about. I just have to take pride in the fact that I am a good friend. I stand by my people though good and bad times. So yeah, I just have to have faith in my friendships and in myself. I am totally comfortable with who I am as a friend. I just have to hold onto that.
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