Today's thoughts
I just came back from a school trip a few days ago.
This trip was a roller coaster in terms of emotions.
When we took the train, I was by myself for two entire hours reflecting on my life. I was down. Absolutely down that I didn't want to go in this attractive city anymore. At the end of the road, two persons talked to me and it was a relief to feel alive and noticed again. And thus I smiled.
There were days when I was fine, happy with the people around me. Others when I was about to burst into tears and though my face erased my smiles I still held it all in.
People talked about some so-called depressed people. I felt stabbed in the back for them not noticing my feelings.
When someone told me I didn't seem to feel good, I lied as always.
When people vented about their problems, I listened carefully trying to help them but still feeling anger inside of me for being that invisible to them.
During the road back home, my sweet teacher said he loved when I was happy because I couldn't stop laughing then. But does being humorous mean being happy? I felt really bad at this remark.
I went home on my home whilst seeing everyone was going home together.
I cherish these moments when I laugh. But now reading poems about loneliness I wish I was able to kick myself for always lying about my true self and my true feelings.
04.03.15
This trip was a roller coaster in terms of emotions.
When we took the train, I was by myself for two entire hours reflecting on my life. I was down. Absolutely down that I didn't want to go in this attractive city anymore. At the end of the road, two persons talked to me and it was a relief to feel alive and noticed again. And thus I smiled.
There were days when I was fine, happy with the people around me. Others when I was about to burst into tears and though my face erased my smiles I still held it all in.
People talked about some so-called depressed people. I felt stabbed in the back for them not noticing my feelings.
When someone told me I didn't seem to feel good, I lied as always.
When people vented about their problems, I listened carefully trying to help them but still feeling anger inside of me for being that invisible to them.
During the road back home, my sweet teacher said he loved when I was happy because I couldn't stop laughing then. But does being humorous mean being happy? I felt really bad at this remark.
I went home on my home whilst seeing everyone was going home together.
I cherish these moments when I laugh. But now reading poems about loneliness I wish I was able to kick myself for always lying about my true self and my true feelings.
04.03.15
Replies
You don\'t need other\'s approval to be happy. It doesn\'t matter what they think of you, what matters is only what you think of yourself