Today,my world is a calmer,quieter place

Good morning journal,the time is 7:18am,I have been awake since just before 7:00am,and I am relaxed and on my first coffee of the day.The one change in my coffee is that I am using artificial sweetener,instead of my usual two spoonfuls of sugar.My wife has taken over my dietary needs,and she is enjoying incorporating better things for me to eat,more protein instead of so many carbohydrates,and lots of water and sugar free liquids to help with detoxifying my body.Yesterday,I managed to go shopping with my wife for the supplies we needed for the remainder of the month;it was a most enjoyable experience,though I was very tired on our return and retired to bed relatively early.On the whole though,I managed to be the same pleasant man I have been over the past couple of days,talking with my wife,listening to her opinions and concerns,and voicing my own in return.As a result,we seem to be bonding ever closer,and I find myself falling in love with this beautiful woman all over again.She is very knowledgeable on the various medical terms used to describe my present condition,and the treatments prescribed,as well as the various drugs used in my treatment.This knowledge comes from her use of the internet,but also,from her time spent as a candy striper in America many years ago.She is a very strong person,and she is pleased that I am listening to her advice,and allowing her to look after me,instead of me just saying I'm fine every time she asks.I have reached the conclusion that I quite like the man I am becoming,I am more like the old me,and though at times I can still dig my heels in,I am working on it,and the result is a very pleasant atmosphere existing between my wife and myself.This morning,there is a quietness in my soul that has been lacking in recent months, it is a good feeling,and my gratitude towards my wife is growing daily.The simple things she does that help me,such as changing the batteries in my hearing aids because my fingers are not dextrous enough,or massaging my back,neck and shoulders to ease my discomfort;make me realize just what a blessing she is in my life.I give myself some credit also,I now know that it isn't a sign of weakness in me to admit that I am a little bit afraid about the future,a bit worried about the outcome,and possible diagnosis,of the tests I have yet to undergo;nor is it a weakness to admit that I am in pain a lot of the time.My wife has told me that she appreciates my honesty of the past few days,and I must admit,it is a comfort to have someone who loves you,and that you love with an equal intensity,to voice your concerns to,and to bounce ideas off.So journal,I continue to feel very positive about the day ahead,and as long as I remember that I am not superman,we should have another good twenty four hours.Until tomorrow then,peace,hope and contentment go with us.

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Scott, this is one of the most pleasant journal entries I have read in a long time. It is so so good to see you communicate with your wife at so many levels and enjoying the opportunities you have with her. Keep it up, I am sure she is taking good care of you, and helping to lead you to a better place physically and mentally. Take care my friend --- Bill
debib399
debib399

Scott,
I am so glad to hear you had a good day. Your wife sounds like a beautiful person and I am glad you have each other. Keep your positive attitude and hang in there my friend.
higginsp
higginsp

Scott, I\'m just so proud of you! You\'ve come such a long way from how you were when we first corresponded, and each day seems to get better for you. How happy your wife must be to see the change taking place in front of her very eyes. I think about you both so much, and pray for you daily. You both truly deserve the happiness you are experiencing together now.