today.... I live with love
wow such a long time since my last journal. Welcome to all the new mom's....... warm heart hugs. it's awful to have to be a part of this group, at the same time it's such a godsend.
Since my last journal.......... hate to the stepmonster.
I'm over it.......... Had a talk with my Tyler........ he put things into perspective, he said, what ever she has to say about anything, is really none of your business, me being friends with her on facebook, is also none of your business. (it hurt to hear, but he was spot on!)
that night I prayed, I talked to my husband, I prayed some more, exhausted, angry, hurt and filled with this burst of emotion, I went to bed. Brandon visited again, confirmed to me that Tyler was indeed correct, it is none of my business.
holy moly, how did I miss that the whole time........ sheesh. Right then and there, I let it go. I'm not the one looking stupid, she doesn't have that power over me. Right then and there, I started living for me!!!! that website, that she intruded on, that is from MY town......... I made a comment.............to her. I said....... Thank you SO MUCH for being his stepmom, I'm glad you were part of his life..... good bad or indifferent........... it felt good to have FINALLY tossed the hate. I've tossed ALL of the hate. nothing but love coming from this lady, and if you DARE to try to bring that ugly shadow into my life, guess what, poof, you will be out of my life, until you realize what a hate filled beast you've become. I have ZERO time for it.
Right then and there, I chose love <3
a bit over 5 weeks until the retreat....... I'm beyond excited. I'm so glad I decided to go on a spur of the moment "intuition" vibe.
Replies
Wow, this sounds like such a monumental step and one towards much freedom for you! Sending love to that loving lady who wrote this journal, Leda
Such a profound moment and healing step! WOW! Returning to LOVE is ALL that matters and for me I realize that when I'm in my fear space it's easier to feel those judgmental moments about myself and others. Returning to love again and again is the freedom that Leda speaks of as hate keeps us imprisoned, doesn't it?
Grateful you'll be at the retreat and those intuitive "hits" are what I live by. The heart always knows!
Loving care and again, way to go with letting go of what is no longer serving you and moving into continued vitality, health and well-being.
XO Joanie
Awesome journal!! Thanks for reminding me - choose love......Hugs. Vicki
WOW! Speaks straight to my soul girlfriend!! I've had to let go of a lot of hate. It hasn't been easy. You'd think it would be, I mean, truly we're only torturing ourselves, but it's hard. And yes, a profound truth....it's none of my business what others do or think of me. Realizing I can't change anyone, can't convince anyone of anything, I'm simply spinning my own wheels getting exhausted and pissED off. NONE OF MY BUSINESS! THANK YOU!
I am SO stinkin excited about the retreat!!! The next one always seems so far in the future when we say our goodbyes, and then all of a sudden, WHAM, it's time to pack for the next retreat!
See you soon beautiful!
(((BRANDON)))