Titles make me want to SCREAM

I've had enough of today.  I talked to everyone on the phone that I had to...my Occupational Therapist and my Psychologists office.  My disability provider is stopping funding for the OT and putting it toward the Psychology sessions for now.  They're trying to say I'm not improving...but my OT stuck up for me and reminded them how far I have come.  But even knowing that and all the positive things....I'm still feeling miserable and having a heck of a time with the negative thoughts and anxiety and crying.  I've already taken 2 ativan and am close to taking a 3rd because I just need a break.  I ended up moving myself back to my room to crawl into bed and hide from the day.  I just had too much and I don't like myself today so it's better this way.  With any luck maybe I'll get a nap and feel a little better.  Waiting to hear from a friend if she wants to go to the food bank tomorrow or not.  Once I hear that will determine if I actually have my shower today or put it off again.  I'm taking today off from the working out and giving myself this one day to have a pity party with myself and then things better be okay tomorrow.  If not I may have to call my psychiatrist to call in a perscription for more ativan.  Well, gonna go.  It's been a long long time since I had one of these "parties" and sometimes it just seems to help if I give myself one day to be this way and get it all out of my system and then move on.  Doing what I can to stay sane and safe in the meantime.  Meh.