Tired of being depressed

I started my journey on medications and therapy in 2011. Have tried dozens of antidepressants and antianxiety medications. It's been so challenging having 3 different disorders to deal with : major depression, generalized anxiety disorder and PMDD(premenstrual dysphoric disorder). When I'm not struggling with the PMDD cycle, I struggle with the other two disorders and it becomes overwhelming. Most recently Ive gone through so many medication changes which has worsened my depression. I'm tired of feeling depressed and needing to gather strength and support from those who are closest to me. I am so grateful and blessed that I have people who are willing to help and support me but it just makes me feel guilty..