thursday: bummer day

  went to my FM meeting. it was a no show. i don't know if that's because of what happened 2 weeks ago when i had to cancel it. i'm not sure what happened today. i gotta get a better word out about us. maybe more flayers all over the island. also went to the VA today and let's just say it was a frustrating long day that i feel was a bunch of wasted time.  i spoke to my bro that lives with us and told him that he gotta get a better paying job cuz i can't keep covering portions that he doesn't. he got mad and threw some attitude at me like it's my fault that he should get a different job, like it's my fault he can't cover ALL his portions of cost of living. i'm sick of covering it and it drains me. he is 25 and shouldn't be this way.   anyway...thanks so much everyone! you all are right, i do need to slow down and yes i do have a list. i write everything down in my daily planner. every day has a box for "to do" list and another box for "appts" to list. so ya, the boxes fill up and i tend to run out of space. maybe that's why i have been freakin out. a lot of good change is coming, but in order to get there it takes work. and i think that's what i'm dreading, all the work it requires. not the time it takes, but the manual labor that will go into it. i just had to write this down cuz i was having a bit of a panic. but i will try to slow down and pace myself. thanks so much for the encouragement!! love you all!