Those three little words....
...can change your life.
Funny how, perhaps one of the most universally used phrases can mean so much to some, so little to others.
"I Love You"
When I use those three little words it mean that I will sacrifice, go the extra mile, put myself at a disadvantage at times, if it means that my partner is happy. But, when do I get the same attention? When do I get treated equally?
I am not asking for a pound of flesh or 4 quarts of blood, but simple respect and, yeah at times, perhaps treated like I am worth going the extra mile for. I want to make a simple request and never hear the words "Should I have to be responsible for your (fill in blank with whatever the request is about)?"again.
I get tired of being the only one that seems to be putting in the work, and yet, somehow I end up feeling bad that I even ask for a favor, as simple as that sounds.
I miss my Mom right now more than most times. She LOVED me, unconditionally. Next week is Mom and Dad's anniversary - it would be their 59th together. And, most of the time, Dad is not even sure what day of the week it is - I don't think he knows it is coming. Last year she went into the hospital around this time - for the last time. She never regained her strength or, due to the pain meds, her mind most of the time. The last thing she said to me was "I hurt SO bad" as a tear feel down her cheek. She wasn't really crying, just shedding tears due to the pain. Then she slipped into a groggy, mostly comatose state until she passed. This is so hard, because she so loved this time of the year.
Wow, this went way off track of why I was journalling - I just feel so alone right now.
Funny how, perhaps one of the most universally used phrases can mean so much to some, so little to others.
"I Love You"
When I use those three little words it mean that I will sacrifice, go the extra mile, put myself at a disadvantage at times, if it means that my partner is happy. But, when do I get the same attention? When do I get treated equally?
I am not asking for a pound of flesh or 4 quarts of blood, but simple respect and, yeah at times, perhaps treated like I am worth going the extra mile for. I want to make a simple request and never hear the words "Should I have to be responsible for your (fill in blank with whatever the request is about)?"again.
I get tired of being the only one that seems to be putting in the work, and yet, somehow I end up feeling bad that I even ask for a favor, as simple as that sounds.
I miss my Mom right now more than most times. She LOVED me, unconditionally. Next week is Mom and Dad's anniversary - it would be their 59th together. And, most of the time, Dad is not even sure what day of the week it is - I don't think he knows it is coming. Last year she went into the hospital around this time - for the last time. She never regained her strength or, due to the pain meds, her mind most of the time. The last thing she said to me was "I hurt SO bad" as a tear feel down her cheek. She wasn't really crying, just shedding tears due to the pain. Then she slipped into a groggy, mostly comatose state until she passed. This is so hard, because she so loved this time of the year.
Wow, this went way off track of why I was journalling - I just feel so alone right now.
Replies
much love to you Steve...I\'m so very sorry about your mum... please put yourself first for once... you so dearly deserve it x
I am so sorry that you are going through this moment. Some periods of time are difficult to deal with since they remember us some painful events. It is good you express your feelings. I don\'t like when I am the only person who does all the work. I think there should be a balance in every type of relationship. I wouldn\'t like either that my partner asked me, if he should be responsible for X request that I do. (((Hugs))))
I hope you are feeling better. Feeling unappreciated is never a good thing. You could still talk to your mom. She probably left all the best answers in your heart.