Thnksgving EXPLOSION, COMING OUT & ITALIAN SPLATTERED!

Thanksgiving was INTERESTING!  SIT DOWN! ROFLOL  Well, let's just start with Thanksgiving was an "explosion", a "coming out, and an "Italian splattered". ROFLOL This was a day that not even my favorite strawberry print apron would fix.  That strawberry patterned apron always makes me feel better when I wear it.  It's my kitchen cooking safety blanket.  I instead chose to wear my full body apron as I was "dressed nicely" for Thanksgiving Day.

OK, first, the explosion, and yes, it was an honest real live explosion!  I was cooking away and had gotten the baked beans into my favorite crock and they were perfectly seasoned.  On to the potatoes (white) and I had gotten them out of the potato bucket to begin peeling.  I started to smell something that sort of smelled like it was burning.  I asked DW, "D, do you smell something burning?"  He said, "Yes."  So, I dropped the potatoes and went to check the baked beans.  I gently lifted the lid and GENTLY put a spoon into stir when BAM! My favorite crock shattered into multiple pieces and baked beans covered the kitchen.  So, I stood there, spoon in hand, wearing a full apron, DW saying, "Mom, you ok?" and very calmly said, "Well, I suppose we will not be having baked beans."  I gently put down the lid of the crock and began to pick up all the pieces of my favorite crock.  I told DW, "I'll just have to wait for the beans to cool off before I can clean them up so I might as well get back to the potatoes."  All very Mr. Rogers like in tone and action! LOL

 David returns home and the beans are still everywhere from the explosion.  He said "WHAT HAPPENED?!"  DW then began to explain and David kind of chuckled.  He said, "Well, did mom cuss or anything?"  DW said, "No."  I told David, "Listen, God looked down at His child today and said 'She did good!' So, I passed my religion test." 

David did help scoop up the beans, I gathered up the scatter rug (yes, it got beaned too) and started scrubbing up the fridge, the floor and the stove.  Finally, I was able to put the potatoes on so I could make mashed potatoes.

Alright, now it ain't over, believe me, it AIN'T OVER!

I was cooking away and had to stop to sit on my heating pad as my back was breaking.  As I walked out of the kitchen, David made the remark that I hated cooking and it always put me into a bad mood.  OK! LAST STRAW!  MAMMA JUST WENT OVER THE EDGE FULL TILT!  

Then came the "COMING OUT" part of Thanksgiving. I looked at that man of mine, wearing my full apron and gave him stink eye.  I informed him very firmly with squinted eyes and hands on both hips, "David, you best listen up.  It ain't the cooking I hate.  The problem is this.  I am not Ryan's Buffet and if you'd let me do Thanksgiving the way I wanted it instead of adding enough food to feed a nation and putting on one more thing, I could probably handle it.  NEXT YEAR it will be Shoney's or the Methodists cause I am not doing this crap again. I am not PHYSICALLY ABLE to do this.  It is not a matter of liking it, it is a matter of not able.  Each year I get less and less able to do the things that I try to do and you need to realize that fact!" (see where I came out about my health? LOL)  Yeah, I was on a roll.  Then I set my hind end down in my chair with my heating pad while still wearing my full apron!

OK, everyone comes, bringing their cooked goods and sho nuff, WAY TOO MUCH FOOD and no place to put it all.  I ended up eating in my chair in the living room by myself.  Everyone ate and we all decided to rest a bit.

Now, for the ITALIAN SPLATTERED! After everyone left, I began to put the left overs away.  A little later on, I decided I'd try the Italian pasta salad that I'd asked my daughter to make for me.  Well, she'd made a big pan for everyone to eat some.  I go to the fridge, grab the big container of Italian pasta salad (it was full) and using my left hand, lost it and Italian pasta salad splattered everywhere that the baked beans had missed!  So, down on my hands and knees I begin to pick up noodles, cucumbers, tomatoes and yes, all are coated in Italian salad dressing! Slip, slide, scoop, slip, slide, scoop, etc.  

Now, you know about my "Thanksgiving" and just so you know, I did all the above without so much as a cuss word but I did lose my cool on David.  However, I think that would probably fall under "righteous indignation" and be ok. LOL  Again, "God looked down at His child today and said 'She did good!' So, I passed my religion tests." 

PS - I hate that full apron.  Like I said, the strawberry printed one can always make me smile in the kitchen.  It just makes me feel all kinds of happy.

Replies

keepingon
keepingon

Thanksgiving is no holiday for us Mommas. It is a food marathon! Whew!
carolmj
carolmj

Who am I to disagree with God, yes, \"You done good\" ?!?!?!
bgoodwin44
bgoodwin44

YES, You Passed Your Religious Test..

I Think Next Year,
Maybe You Should Order From \'Boston Market\'
There Turkeys Are GREAT !

Love Ya, Barbara
FIC
FIC

Dearest NAN - The original Pilgrims didn\'t have as much food as I cooked and I might add all the women of the colony helped. SHEEZ! I think the reason turkeys get stuffed is so we women don\'t use our hands to put them around others necks! ROFLOL
FIC
FIC

Dearest CAROL - Yeah, I don\'t cuss anyway, but I suppose that hubby thought this would be my breaking point. He forgets we been wed 32 yrs and I have put up with his family\'s snubs all that time without going Rambo. My skin has thickened and my attitude has gotten to be \"Well, done all I could, the rest is up to God.\" LOL
FIC
FIC

Dearest BARBARA - We live in the sticks. We don\'t even have a decent store close! The closest, and it\'s a Wal-Mart, is 20-30 minute drive. ROFLOL