This Word Called Love

"We Always Tend To Learn More About Ourselves When Using This Word Called Love"

September 21, 2017

I think there are some people that will never truly try to fully love someone the way they truly know how to love, or in fact even want to be loved in ways they love themselves. But this is only a theory of mine (a somewhat maybe), a huge maybe, and why? Because of how they themselves have experienced and learn from all of their past relationship mistakes (when it came to loving and respecting another individual), someone who they once cared for, who they've honored, who they've fully supported, and protected 100% at the time. 

Let's also not forget that they loved that partner so dearly, but in their very own loving intimate way. No one will ever appreciate or respect an "unspoken goodbye" from someone that once meant the world to them. A half decent partner would not let someone (who they once cared about), just walk around with a heavy heart that was filled with so much guilt, plus a troubled and confused mind. Understand that a partner who truly valued and said they once loved you would make sure that you understood everything there is to be understood before turning their back on you for the very last time, period. So now that all of this being said, "just realize that they never once loved you like they claim to."

Ask God to take away all the bitterness and all the resentment that you might still carry, and replace it with forgiveness and all the love that's within you. Ask God to take care of the part you've been neglecting these past years and to focus a little bit more on your heart, more so mainly to heal it. Always try to give people going through this the benefit of the doubt if they ever one day become someone irritable. 

Now one bad life incident and one wrong person should not let one start to give up on themselves. There was a day that I finally realize that I was tired of swimming upstream. Swimming against an unjustified shity current, but know that they will too go through this one day, and not trying to say that this can be ones karma. You will come to accept the realities of dealing with a significant other, or a now Ex. Nobody these days "DON'T" want nice, but if that's how you want to remain, then by all means "BE" the nice one. Hell, I think I'm nice whether anyone thinks so or not. 

Now' listen carefully to what I've been wanting to say for quite some time now, "what I am not, is a "DAMN" fool. I am not an idiot (that one can complain about), with others and it wouldn't surprise me if  she was still calling me an asshole. You think I'm flattered when she describes me (as someone different), and slowly doesn't seem to recognize or know me anymore.? Shit, I'm utterly insulted, if thats the case because "SOMEONE DIFFERENT" is what I wanted and tried very hard to be and I'm very happy with that."

People who love you, and who have always loved you, just know they've always had your back and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Don’t ever feel stupid for loving the wrong person. We tend to doubt ourselves at times and look back on everything we shared with them. I've learned that when you hurt someone that you once cared about (and this without even realizing), what you don't know is that your only breaking your own heart at the same time.

Sometimes you can't help but to just feel so stupid for being so blind (when you knew something was wrong), and didn't want the honest truth of that matter, and I've finally had to learn to accept those faults. But know that I've learn from them.  We tend to avoid all those red flags. I once said, "those freakin red flags that slapped me clear across that face of mine." Now we can be hard on oneself (but only during those certin times) but we find it easy to FORGIVE, but can't seem to try to FORGET all those years spent together with them. Maybe you were just being played by them from the very beginning - from day 1. There might have been a slight chance / a somewhat possibility that they might have manipulated and taken advantage of you, but hopefully that wasn't the case.  

You sometimes feel so stupid for listening and believing some of those lies (lies that were shared and that you caught wind on), and once in a while you find yourself rereading every singal text message or an email that was sent by them. You cannot control how they speak about you. Do not assume to know, and do not torture yourself over that which you cannot control. You will learn to do this, and you will learn to remember the reasons this love DIDN'T work. Stop being so pathetic, and try not to get yourself lost by reliving every single memory you once had with an Ex, if possible. 

Don’t feel stupid for loving someone, and why not? For it’s never stupid to love. God said, "that we must learn to love one another." Now this word called Love... love can be complicated, can be messy, disastrous, hectic and in fact, so dam scary. Also, never feel stupid for loving someone that may have been wrong for you. OK, now heres something to think about? The only thing thats stupid in this case (when loving someone), is the fact that (an Ex, or lover), made a decision - they ended up letting you go. That's their freakin loss, but you — you are kind, loyal, strong, brave, beautiful, and fucken smart. Believe that and always try to stay that way.

Understand that a person who emotionally manipulates you who isn’t a lover, but a close friend can be a horrible form of betrayal that can also leave a huge dent in one's heart. I read somewhere weather if it's a romantic relationship or not, but know that ones heart can still feel crushed by this form of manipulation. Someone fucked with your heart in a hurtful way, and you’ll never let them near it ever again. Who can blame you for doing so.

Their are so many scared and well garded people who have been cheated on (and yes - been cheated multiple times as well), and this from past loving partners, but know that those are individuals who only thrive on their own cheating ways, lies, and their self drama issues. Sometimes they tend to do it in a hurtful selfish betrayal kind of way.  When someone decides to cheat on you... you can not do a dam thing about it. It's going to happened (either behind your back or in plain public view), and listen... weather you like it or not. That is one shity decision you don't have control of... it's the person that's doing the cheating that is making or continuing with this kind of hurtful decision. The reality of it is that there is really nothing anyone can do or change when cheating is being encouraged by others, period. Just try to learn to FORGIVE them and FORGET what took place (which is not an easy thing to do), and I'm referring to this word we all use called - "FORGET," but know that the cheating was done in the past... we can't change what was done (so try to learn to FORGET even though it's hard), and know that it's now part of one's very own life experience. You will always wish that it never happened, but sometimes life’s greatest lessons are learned in the hardest of ways. You knowing and admitting all of your wrongs is the only thing that matters, but I say, "what’s done is done and you don’t know how to make it right, that is... if it even still matters to the one that hurts." 

Why can't people look at everything good they have done? Even went as far as to try to make mends with them? But to them, it never outweighs the mistakes that were made by the both of you. There are mistakes that aren’t as easily forgivable, no matter how much good you might do, people tend to only remember those mistakes. Why isn't saying "SORRY" is just not enough anymore? Especially when you truly do mean it? Don't they know those mistakes will always haunt and hurt us? Realizing we learn to live with the choices that were made back then, and yes, even the ones you so want or wish you can take back. Sometimes people might not ever forgive us but the best thing you can do is learn. The best thing you can do is... to forgive yourself, and why is that? Because there isn’t enough regret or sorrow that can change what has happened, but always remember you are not defined by the worst thing you’ve done to someone but rather where you go from there on now. 

Relationships are, and can be lovely and fun to be a part of... but only when both sides have all the same mutual trust, faith, love, respect, and loyalty. Always focus on bringing out the best that is in you and from within your other half. Which means don't bring out the worst in you or in fact, your partner. 

Now, never forget that everyone has and will have their own vulnerable moments, but that doesn't mean you have to take advantage of them during those times they are vulnerable. These may be the kind of people who will only settle in ways they only know or in fact, know how they want to be treated... like in some of those cheating disrespectful forms of ways that tent to keep repeating. To me, those are only stupid and dumb childish kinds of acts, so break that awful cycle.

Please, you need to understand that those are not the kind of people that you want to know or even want to be involved with when it comes to the way you live your life nowadays. Sometimes you may not have no other choice but to only feel sorry for them when running into those certain kind of people. Know that there are people in this world that will love you to the moon and even all the way to the end of the earth and back. Those are the kind of people that will always protect your heart and most likely offered you theirs without any hesitation whatsoever. 

Weather you believe it or not, there are people that will not try to break you into a million little pieces intentionally, and those are people who in fact do care about every mundane detail of someone's ordinary day in life. One loving word and a huge hug are enough to ensur a person that you love and care for. Remember that love should be someone’s strength, not their weakness. Try to be an amazing, loving, caring, compassionate, respectful, loyal, and of course, a grateful, a kind and humble human being.  Always choose your close friends carefully. I think this is one important principle to optimize our life, and for one simple reason: our close friends will always have a great huge influence on us.

Now I can say that, "one will never... truly know this... but maybe, just maybe... you could of have been that one person... if given that one opportunity to be loved, you think? Now look, that's only a huge maybe. These are some new ways we all tend to learn and cope with over the past years, especially when it came to loving someone or wanting to be loved by someone in the same way we love ourselves. Know that there can be victory after every defeat that you encounter, and there are hard lessons to be learned in every heartbreak. I learned how to cope with hard things life threw my way at times all by myself, and most importantly I learned how to work on myself without having someone to stand by, or with me."

*** 

Love this paragraph...

"With the loving help and support from my loving father from up above - Jesus Christ. Little by little I’ve been working on breaking down these walls I’ve built so high (as high as the Empire State Building), and maybe next time around I’ll be able to let someone special that God has brought and provided this "one of a kind" partner that will change my world for the better. As long as you let them because they will be passionate and loyal, they are unforgettable and selfless. Ones very own life changer that God has provided for you, and you better never let them go. Give them a chance to truly know you and maybe be a part of your new life, and yes... even as a friend. But until then, I will always wait patiently because I have so much faith in Him"