this shouldn\'t be so hard

T is high maintainance.  Either he's a dry drunk or is doing something that can't be detected or his behavior is a result of years of getting away with things OR a combination of a number of things.  On the other hand -  he has made great strides and has improved in some areas but I still think he's not thinking as a recovering addict "should" be.   Went and got him at school for his counseling appointment today.  I told him I would have Chipotle (his favorite) waiting for him when I pick him up.  Had to get something else, however, because it was too early for his favorite place.  On the way to counseling he had asked if we would be back by a certain time because he wanted to hook up with his friends for senior lunch.  I should have kept my mouth shut and told him I didn't know.  Well....he threw a fit when I told him that I doubted it.  All of a sudden chemistry is important to him - had to get back immediately.  He couldn't miss it and started in.  Unfortunately, the counselor was 20 minutes behind which didn't help - causing T to get madder and madder - eventually leaving the waiting room.  The counselor then came out to meet us and I told him that T left.  He went and got him and told me that they would talk about 15 minutes.  It only took 10 because T was biting at the bit.  We left and he swore at me telling me that I am the one who needs help.  He's got that one right.....but he does too.    Having said all of this the assessment is supposed to take place next week.  Yikes!  If he's accepted I know he will decide that court is the answer so that he can tell the judge that he's testing clean.  The caseworker told me that T doesn't want to go to court.  That would be a mistake.  If he is assessed, however, that he is not accepted because he's not using......then I hope we can find some alternatives - like accountabiliy for AA and court ordered to go to extra counseling.  Something!  Because this kid is still running the show. Just got off of the phone with the counselor that comes to our house.  He said it's unlikely that T would be accepted into the 90 day treatment center because of 3 things: no proof of usage, no more criminal offenses, and his attitude of not wanting to go.  Then why bother driving a total of 4 hours and pulling him out of school now that the new school quarter has started?  It doesn't make sense to me.  Maybe this could be a wake up call - just driving there...is a good reminder to stay clean and out of trouble. A year ago today T broke into some cars and stole some items and prescription pills. I kindly reminded him to stay out of trouble.  "We" have come a long way from those days and, hopefully we won't see them again.   All I know is that my husband and I are going to have fun at our neighbors celebrating Halloween on a Friday night so.......enough said..... Happy Halloween.......