Thinking on Thursday...
One of the things I thought of in the early stages was, Mothers lost their children during the holocaust the trials they went through, the pain and anguish, not being able to mourn or have proper ceremony, I tend to think there is always someone with it worse than me, so I try and look at things half full rather than half empty.
I have started reading Shindler's list, it helps me take stock in my own life.
Marylou
I have started reading Shindler's list, it helps me take stock in my own life.
Marylou
Replies
Hugging oh so tight Marylou as you find your way through this agonizing, heart crushing pain.
Although there is no \"easy\" way, no \"better\" way, to lose a child, I must admit, knowing my child walked out the door that night with a huge smile on her face, having said \"I love you too\", does make the horror of what happened a few short hours later a bit easier for me.... I think we all need to grab onto whatever it is we can to give ourselves that little nudge towards half full.... I hope the moms who\'ve lost children to disease can find a little nudge in knowing they held their child and said all that was needed to be said in those last moments....
No, none of this is easy or fair or right......it just is what it is.....the most horrendous, heartbreaking disaster of our lives.... I am tattered and torn and all the worse for wear....but I AM half full and doing my very best to fill myself up with the LOVE and encouragement of all the moms here and that of my precious child.
May peace find your heart today...and stay a while....
Whatever it takes to make it through the moment and that is what you are doing...
I found peace in the books I read on grief and loss early on and the journals here on FMO because just to know that others knew and understood my pain and were still alive to speak and write of it let me know that I was okay and would continue to BE. Those heartstrings of hope that I was holding tightly onto were there and oh, how I needed them and continue to.
I think early on for me my heart and brain were trying to undestand layer by layer the excrutiating sadness and pain of losing my son. I believe we would implode if it all came in at once and that is why it does often feel like waves or the peeling away of layers one at a time. Only as much as one can take for the moment and then a sealing off so to speak before another round...
Loving care and a pocket full of peace in the midst of uncovering gently what you must absorb and surrendering what does not serve you.
In gratitude for your courage to express as you are in your journals what you are pondering because it brings those thoughts and feelings into the light. It is healing for you and healing each of us as you jog within me thoughts and feelings that need some oxygen and light. Thank YOU.
XO Joanie
I had a counselor tell me once that during the great wars if our time that it was not uncommon for many mothers in the same community to have lost sons...and so they would get together and share their loss. That is what we do here...and each if us process grief in different ways. So do what seems to fit best for you...take gentle care...Karen
Just wanted to tell you how sorry I am that you\'re a new member of this group. I lost my 23 year old son 40 weeks ago and every day is a struggle. At least we have a place here to share with the only people who actually understand.