Things are starting to get better

Ok so me and my girlfriend have been fighting alot these past couple of weeks but we have gotten it to stop these past couple of days we have been getting better and then last night was completely amazing we were fighting or upset, but my main problem is no matter how good things are getting i still feel like dying and im not sure why. Everyday i closer to doing it.. but I refuse to leave my girlfriend i love her to damn much to hurt her like that. Baby, I know i've said some really mean and stupid things these past couple of weeks, but baby i really love you and i'll do anything to keep u by my side