things are on my mind

I find myself pushing people away, cause these people my "friend" has pushed me away.  But, don't care about that anymore (even thogh I do keep obsessing over this issue in my mind,  more her kid's doing stuff I don't like,  and her "silly and goofy" husband  refering to my name as mames I don't like)

I don't like leaving the house Because, I don't feel like doing anything, as of late.  Been feeling deppressed lately too, if it's not my foot it's my hand or something else.

don't really like socializing with people anymore.

Speaking of pushing people away,  I did use to know a girl at camp.....It was a camp for secial need's people, like me,  I use to socialize with her,

anyway, the camp use to bring a prom to us...Stuff liike that.  One night she asked to see me outside of camp, I was so nervous I didn't know what to tell her.

So, I just put it out of my mind. When I got  home, I'd been there for a few day's, when I got a letter from her,  telling  me how much she missed me,  as it turned out, all she wanted was to invite me to her school prom....I called her and declined.   I think about that, everytime I see her on facebok, she has emailed me, and has told me that she told her grandparent's that she had a boyfriend (me)  I feel so bad about that, because of me she probably missed her school prom (hopefully she found someone else to go with her)

I know they say  You should live life without regret, but, I'll alway's regret that one, and potential friendship's I've declined........IDK I just let thing's bother me, Idk Why,  and stuff weighs on my mind.