Things are a little better

So I could just shoot my husband.  I am not saying my son is w/o blame for losing control, but hubby doesn't help.  Here, we found the Zune hidden in a drawer.  (Where Paul hid it!)  Paul did apologize but the damage was done.  And the time and energy we wasted looking for everything!  David was almost an angel all weekend, Thank God!  He cleaned his room.  He just about finished cleaning his bathroom.  He cut the grass without being asked, mind you.  He also cut my neighbor's yard and was paid $30.  He helped set the table.  No major outbursts.  He did great at karate on Saturday.  Paul even took him to the movies yesterday since he was so good.  YEAH!  Mommy got some alone time and finished reading one book and started reading another.  Weather was pretty good and actually got the new umbrella up on my patio furniture.  Paul finished painting the sunroom and I am ready to scrub the floor and start moving my furniture back in.  I had stopped off on Friday afternoon up in Lancaster and picked up a cool new rug for the sunroom.  I got my period on Saturday AM and had to battle cramps all day, even with medication.  Going to OB/GYN on Wednesday.  Will discuss peri-menopause concerns with her.  I have symptoms, just no hot flashes.   Eating this past weekend just sucked, big time.  So today is June 1 and I am going to get back on track.  I need to start writing it all down again and also get back to the Y and my exercise.   I spent the afternoon yesterday also brushing the dog and getting her nails cut.  Poor little girl.  She just had this huge mat on her side.  I knew it was a big knot but did not realize how bad it was until I sat here and started working on it.  Played my "Dog Ease" cd from Brookstone with very soothing music.  She just snoozed through the whole process.  Took me almost an hour to get that mat out as it was right next to her skin.  I could tell she felt so much better after I got that out.   Hopefully Paul will get my bathroom painted and done so I can get that room back together.  The clutter around here is just getting to me!  I have been having some minor anxiety attacks, mostly due to work.  I just heard today that a woman in another office that my boss knew for years, just committed suicide.  Jumped in front of a truck.  Puts things in perspective for me.  Fortunately, worked from home today and will try to find ways to work at home all week and get things under control.  I am going on vacation for 2 weeks, 6/29 to 7/10.  So I am under more pressure to clean up beforehand.  If I let this all get to me, I get nothing done.  I will be putting in some OT this week and next trying to get out from under.  Still no replacement for my coworker that quit a few months ago, and now we are in a hiring freeze.  Even my boss is telling me to cut corners.  I am just running out of corners to cut and still behind.   So I will keep plugging.  My mini goal is to lose another 10 lbs.  I want to get to 146.  I am still standing at 156, which is 10 down from my start.  So I need to focus.  I feel like I am in a catch 22:  when I feel good, food is not as much of an issue.  When I feel awful, I binge.  When I feel good, I WANT to exercise, and then I feel even better.  When I get stressed, I want to go crawl in a hole.  I was so positive the end of the year.  I just have to get my mind set back to that point.  Anyway, will start with a nice long walk with the dog tonight.   David is done school on Thursday.  That is good and bad.  Good, no more stress.  He can sleep in and I really don't care, except days he goes to camp.  Bad, he is home all day except every other week at camp.  If I can survive until vacation, the two weeks off will really do me some good.  Some rest and relaxation.  Hopefully, the new me will arise when I get back.