The Universe Has Made My Decision
Yesterday I received a "rejection letter" in the mail for a part-time job I had applied for. This is the third part-time position that I've been rejected for in the past 4 months. When I first moved to the tiny town of Joshua Tree from the City of San Diego in July 2010, I had applied for a part-time position with Copper Mountain College in their payroll department. The job looked excellent on paper with many attributes: fairly decent pay for this remote area; pro-rated benefits; pension plan membership; 15 paid holidays; 6-mile commute; and 20 hours per week with a flexible schedule. Unfortunately, the job was a complete STRESSFEST! My Fibro and IBS symptoms were at an all-time high during the short 5 months I was in the position. I lasted only from mid-August to mid-January and had to resign in the name of my health and my sanity.
I have struggled over the past year about the fact that I gave up a really good job with the City of San Diego as a Personnel Analyst. I went back to school late in life to finish my bachelors degree so that I could finally get a professional career. I started as an unpaid intern and was hire as a full-time employee 9 months later. I loved the work I did and it was interesting and challenging. Upon moving to a remote town such as J-Tree, I found that my options were very few. The jobs that have been available to apply for all are mundane clerical positions. I realize I cannot be happy with those types of positions any longer because I've been stuck in dead-end jobs all my life! The reason I went back to school was to get away from those horrible clerical jobs. Why put myself back into that situation after I worked so hard?
Thankfully my husband is very supportive and has told me I don't need to work at all. This gives me far more leeway than if I were supporting myself. Therefore, I am going to continue to enjoy my freedom and be much more selective in trying to find work. It may take a long time to find the right situation, so in the meantime I plan on engaging in volunteer work. I think the bottom line is the Universe made the decision for me. :-) I had been very torn about this most recent position because deep down I had a feeling I'd be unhappy and stressed out. Part of me actually had hoped they would NOT hire me! So I guess I now have my answer.
I am going to try to let go of my fear of not having enough money. That will be my next task!
I have struggled over the past year about the fact that I gave up a really good job with the City of San Diego as a Personnel Analyst. I went back to school late in life to finish my bachelors degree so that I could finally get a professional career. I started as an unpaid intern and was hire as a full-time employee 9 months later. I loved the work I did and it was interesting and challenging. Upon moving to a remote town such as J-Tree, I found that my options were very few. The jobs that have been available to apply for all are mundane clerical positions. I realize I cannot be happy with those types of positions any longer because I've been stuck in dead-end jobs all my life! The reason I went back to school was to get away from those horrible clerical jobs. Why put myself back into that situation after I worked so hard?
Thankfully my husband is very supportive and has told me I don't need to work at all. This gives me far more leeway than if I were supporting myself. Therefore, I am going to continue to enjoy my freedom and be much more selective in trying to find work. It may take a long time to find the right situation, so in the meantime I plan on engaging in volunteer work. I think the bottom line is the Universe made the decision for me. :-) I had been very torn about this most recent position because deep down I had a feeling I'd be unhappy and stressed out. Part of me actually had hoped they would NOT hire me! So I guess I now have my answer.
I am going to try to let go of my fear of not having enough money. That will be my next task!
Replies
When my husband was still alive I faced a situation when I was diagnosed with CFIDS of having to pass up jobs I had gone to college for. Now without my husband and being completely disabled I am simply thankful for the widow\'s benefits and finding my way.
Illness is simply the pits!!
I hope you one day have that job you crave.
For me I\'m thinking perhaps doing something from home -- I may be able to handle at least that.
((hugs)) Patricia
HI Patricia:
I think what is key is that we try to focus on what we DO have, rather than what we lack. I have to prevent myself from looking back. One of the reasons I had to leave the job at the City of SD was because my health took a turn for the worse. That prompted me to move to Joshua Tree rather than insist that my new husband move to San Diego. I know if I had not gotten ill, I would have stayed in SD and continued with the job I love. However, things changed. I need to accept that!
You are an inspiration in that you can see how lucky you are to have a benefit from your late husband that helps you survive on your own. I know what it\'s like to have health issues get in the way of working. Perhaps if you do figure out something you can do from home, you can share your success with me. I am not sure what I can do here in JT, as it\'s a tiny town with just 8,500 people. I\'m a bit nervous about any on-line thing because of the scams out there.
Anyway, one thing I\'m grateful for is that I\'m feeling a lot better these days when I have no stress in my life. Now I just need to conquer that fear of not having money because that in of itself causes stress. One day at a time, right?
Hugs,
Mary :-)