The slip
When did it start? It's hard to tell. At some point during the week I felt the space of ambivalence. The rosy pink cloud phase was over, and I was bored with my sobriety. But I had almost made it a month. I figured I was doing pretty darn good. The familiar sequence of events goes like this. I've been able to resist alcohol. Maybe I am not really an alcoholic after all. I can, and often do, control my drinking when I really need to. Maybe I just need to be more careful. I can probably handle moderate drinking. I think I just got scared and blew the situation out of proportion. Hence, the relapse cycle begins. I sat in my therapist's office defensively, saying that I wasn't sure I was committed to complete sobriety. I knew the party was coming up. Did I really want to go and explain to my friends that I have quit drinking entirely, be bored and socially awkward, or can I just this once have fun the way I know how to do it? No. I know I shouldn't drink. I know this is a trap that the addict has laid out for me. I really should go to the party because I haven't seen my friend in so long. But I cannot drink. But the craving is getting stronger. Why now? Why this week? The day of the party, I was upset by a conversation I had with BF. The topic doesn't matter, it was the same issue and fear that arises periodically. Feeling unsettled, I knew if I went to the party I would drink. I posted on DS for help I got in the car. I thought to myself, now I understand why people get sponsors. Somewhere on the freeway the addict took over. Screw it, I want to drink. I can drink if I want. Having planned to meet BF later I knew I couldn't get too drunk. After all he still doesn't know about my "problem" (if I really have one) and I don't want to make trouble. So I will just have one or two drinks. I get to the party. There are some people drinking, some not drinking. It would be easy to be a non-drinker. But after 5 minutes with friends there is my glass of wine. I begin to socialize. Having not the full effect of the alcohol, it was difficult. After my second drink, I was talking up a storm. Life is good, I feel better, I am having fun now. The woman I was talking to finished her one and only drink and said, OK I am getting some water, I have to drive. I quickly said, "me too." Remembering my promise not to drink too much. But before long there was glass #3, then a beer, and there I was avoiding said woman so she didn't know I was losing control. It's 11 now. I am thoroughly buzzed. But I think I can still drive and it's time to meet BF. I needed to get out of this party now. I think I can still drive, but know darn well I would be in trouble if I were pulled over. The woman said goodbye to me and added, "be careful driving." Crap, she knew.
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