The Road Travelled
Yesterday as I traveled this road I am now on, if you read my journal actually I wrote 2 but the last one I was having a total melt down....I never feel happy any more, I never feel that anyone understands....I know this sadness is now a part of me....I read about other's who seem to have made their way through this dark dark road we all have been traveling, too hear them say,,,,,I had a melt down ....I cried and cried yesterday....and then I realized that no matter the days, the months, the years that pass..we never really get over the loss. We always will feel a part of us is missing and just want it all back to normal.
I do believe we get to a place where everyday is not as painful as the first days our child left us, when everything was so totally fresh, but I do think that something will trigger us and it will feel just like it did in the very beginning and for a time we feel the extreme pain of our loss all over again.
As I am now sure everyone has heard a beautiful lady went and joined her son in Heaven. Can you picture that reunion....Ms Edwards first enters the beautiful Heaven gates and she is welcomed with outstretched arms of our Jesus, our God, our eternity......I can see she is now surrounded by love warm happy love wraps around her and now she feels peace....no longer the pain of the cancer, the pain of the hurt that life gave her....now she is feeling nothing but pure love and joy.....after resting in the arms of Heavenly Father she looks up to see the beauty surrounding her...in a distance she sees a figure...for a moment she knows that figure, she knows it is someone who had been in her life on earth....then with all the power that she now has from the freedom of the pain of this earth, she runs and in an instant her son, her baby is again in her arms....There are no more tears as she and her son are now reunited together for eternity. She is now at home forever she and her son. What a beautiful sight as the angels sing welcoming her home.....A mother....A son...Together again....Forever...
One day when our time comes and God calls us home....we will be like Ms Edwards...joined again forever with our child in Heaven.
I do believe we get to a place where everyday is not as painful as the first days our child left us, when everything was so totally fresh, but I do think that something will trigger us and it will feel just like it did in the very beginning and for a time we feel the extreme pain of our loss all over again.
As I am now sure everyone has heard a beautiful lady went and joined her son in Heaven. Can you picture that reunion....Ms Edwards first enters the beautiful Heaven gates and she is welcomed with outstretched arms of our Jesus, our God, our eternity......I can see she is now surrounded by love warm happy love wraps around her and now she feels peace....no longer the pain of the cancer, the pain of the hurt that life gave her....now she is feeling nothing but pure love and joy.....after resting in the arms of Heavenly Father she looks up to see the beauty surrounding her...in a distance she sees a figure...for a moment she knows that figure, she knows it is someone who had been in her life on earth....then with all the power that she now has from the freedom of the pain of this earth, she runs and in an instant her son, her baby is again in her arms....There are no more tears as she and her son are now reunited together for eternity. She is now at home forever she and her son. What a beautiful sight as the angels sing welcoming her home.....A mother....A son...Together again....Forever...
One day when our time comes and God calls us home....we will be like Ms Edwards...joined again forever with our child in Heaven.
Replies
Sandi, you are so right and the way you described E. Edwards and her reunion with her son makes me envious....in fact, when I heard that she passed....I was sad for myself. I am eager for that reunion. God has plans though and I must wait. Peace be yours whenever you can find it. Love and hugs, dale...brandon\'s mom
That is so beautiful. You are so right no matter how many years pass we will always long for our past but we will keep doing our best until our day arrives. Hugs!!!
Sandi I do understand your pain and the feelings of your great loss. My oldest son of two died in 1997 of complications with his health. he was young but an adult. I was his caregiver for the last year of his life. It has been a long time since but I have my times honey when I cry my heart out with the emtpyness. It does get less painfull as time goes on but our grief is a very strong emotion. It\'s been 13 years for since my son died and I can
tell you that we dont get over someone we love ever. Holidays, birthdays,songs, dates ,places they all plague our memories. But it\'s not over we will see our sons again in a better place where we never have to part. God needed them more and he knew he could trust us with the scars until the day of reunion with them. When you feel that you need to talk to someone who understands call on me we\'ll walk throught together. Strength and growth is a process just keep walking and keep breathing and trusting in God.
God Bless you sweet lady
Hugs and Love Rachel
All of us know that our life will never be the same after losing our dear children. We will always have a saddness lingering within us. We will have meltdowns. We CAN believe we will meet again in another time and place. Our children would be disappointed in us if we wasted away. We must try to make them proud for the life we have lived when we meet again. We are mothers, our identity, the protectors, what makes us who we are. We are lost without that piece of ourselves, our creation. It was not meant to be but it is. We should look to the strength of Elizabeth Edwards and try to grab just of piece of her grace. Bless you, Sandi, all FMO and the Edwards family.
Such beautiful visions of Elizabeth Edwards wrapped in the arms of her Lord and then the REUNION. Her son, Wade. Oh happy day!! God bless you, Elizabeth Edwards. Rest in the Lord.
Rest in Peace Elizabeth Edwards, you are quite a lady, Susan
I had been reading Elizabeth Edwards first book just before my daughter\'s cancer was identifed.. even then, I so connected with the words she had about losing her son, and I have thought of her so many times these past 2 years. I can only imagine how much her children on earth are going to miss her but also how happy she is to reunited with Wade..
This is the new normal as my husband says and as I have said before we learn to live around them being gone.... or at least that is what I am doing. I do not think I truly will ever be happy again how can I . I love Dave so much and miss him so deep in my soul. However I can smile laugh and enjoy things again I see the beauty in little things ..like the beautiful sunny crisp morning today. I could not do that last year things are getting a little easier to deal with day by day. I still have a husband, 2 sons that want their Mom, a grandbaby Jack and another one on the way I have to try for them they still need me to be me.
Marilyn xo
Sandi, your journal entries always have a profound impact on me. I love the way you can put all your thoughts and feelings into words. And those words always seem to mirror exactly how I am feeling. It truly touches my heart and soul. Thank you Sandi, for everything you share with us. Love and hugs, Diane