The road to Beta #1...

So, if I'm being totally honest, for the past week, I've felt nothing. I mean NOTHING, nada, no symptoms whatsoever. This was beginning to make me feel pretty disheartened. On Sunday (that would put me 6dp5dt), I caved and took a HPT. Negative. I was crushed, but not entirely surprised. It was a digital ClearBlue and those are the ones that say " Not Pregnant," unmistakably. (Sometimes, I think it should just say, "you suck!" because that's how it makes me feel. Ya know)?

On Monday, I was about to hop in the shower before my appt with my therapist. (I started seeing her because she's also an IF soul sister. I began our sessions in anticipation of starting this cycle and they have been tremendously helpful)! Anyhow, I didn't even want to take another HPT because I couldn't deal with the repeated disappointment. It also wasn't my first morning urine. Against my better judgment, I took one anyway. I got into the shower because the digital results were taking what seemed like an eternity. When I got out, I peered without my glasses at the thing, ready for the inevitable. I saw the "pregnant" part, and squinted to see the "not" part. But it said "pregnant 1-2" weeks!!!!!!

...commence hysterical sobbing, with dripping wet hair & looking like a total lunatic... :,-)

I collected myself, trying not to get all crazy and ahead of the game. The next two days brought more good news. Yet another HPT (diff brand, diff box) and it also read a faint positive.

I went into today's beta feeling good. Blood drawn at 7am and then I waited. And waited. And waited. At about 3pm, the clinic's number popped up on my cell. The nurse's first word? "Congratulations!" Which was all the prompting I needed to start bawling. Between my choked sobs and profuse "thank yous," I heard her tell me to keep taking the PIO injections, to come back for bloodwork again in 2 days, and that my hCG was 115 or 117 -- I couldn't process the information, I was too overwhelmed and overjoyed and numbers weren't sticking in my brain. All I could hear was that one word, "congratulations." And that's all I needed to know. At least for today. Tomorrow is a new day.

And I'll continue to keep you all posted! All I can say is... Much love for your support and encouragement. I truly feel like your positive energy is why I'm celebrating this joyous news right now. I feel like I can finally breathe again...