The Return to MGH

12/9/2012. One year ago today. It was a Sunday. Dina had been struggling with fluid accumulation yet again the previous few days. She had an appointment with her cardiologist scheduled for that coming Monday, I believe, so he suggested she try to hold out until then. If it became too much then we could just go to the hospital as we had done three times before for this. On that Saturday it was getting to the point where Dina knew she needed the fluid drained. We called the covering doctor who informed us that the hospital this had been done at previously did not do this procedure on the weekend. He suggested increasing her diuretic for the day to see if that would help take some of the fluid off. If it didn’t then we would have to go into Boston to Mass General, which is where the original surgery was done anyways. Sure enough she didn’t have much relief by Sunday so off we went. We had a sinking suspicion that since we were going to MGH they weren’t just going to ‘tap’ her and send her on her way. And we were right. They wanted to do something to prevent this from continuing to happen rather than just treat it again, so she was admitted. Not really what we wanted at that point (over 6 weeks removed from the heart surgery) but we knew it was probably best. I had to leave her before they got her settled into a room, but she was okay, especially since I just went out and got her Subway! What I didn’t know when I left her was that she would never be home again. I didn’t know that the night before was going to be the last time we ever slept in the same bed together. Or the last time she ever fed our daughter dinner and helped put her to bed. Or that morning when we were leaving was the last time she would ever see our house. Or, most especially, that just under a week later she would be fighting to stay alive. Even at the worst of times I was/am typically able to stay optimistic, and this time was no different. Especially at 33 years old, you just don’t think of this stuff. It has now been a year since she was last at home with us and it’s unreal to think of how different life is only a year later.