The Lone Ranger

But Im not the lone ranger. Not when Im here at least. Here I know things are understood. Im tired of complacency. Im tired of being the one who it alienated for verbalizing an opposition to favoritism in the workplace, to infidelity in relationships, or hell--who knows-- to just general right verses wrong. I am not heard. In fact, I am instead ostrasized. To speak in terms of the "rights" in life, you run the risk of being the "uncool" one- the one "outside of the loop". She's not cool. She's one of them, la la...la la. "One of THEM? And just who the fuch is "them", for God's sake? Is there any "UNCOOL-ONE OF THEM OUT OF THE LOOP KNOWS RIGHT FROM WRONG" congregation that Ive yet to learn about or join?  Im worn. Hard work can mean nothing when flirting or being savvy seem to reap better rewards.  Today I felt the tip of the sword in my chest when I was reprimanded for offenses I did not commit at work, while the manager's "pet" (his "baby", as he has referred to in the past) was "nudged" as if to say "this speech isnt meant for you", as she  stood at his side as if they'd already had their alliance, and I stood there,  the outsider who was used as an "example" of his authority. How many more conversations do I have to act like I dont see coming to an abrubt halt as I approach. A fuckin fly on the wall is the most blessed creature and doesnt even know it.   Food and alcohol costs hadnt met the net sales, which of course alerted the owner to employee consumption. Not my offense, not my issue.  I didnt handle it well. I didnt blow up or anything but I didnt reason well in my own defense either.I didnt handle it as well as most people might have. I was too sensitive to the already stewing feelings I had for the favoritism that I have stomached as of recently.  My bad. Damn I fuckin live my life with those " wish I would have said this" situations.  Its just a damn restaraunt job. Im a waitress but its a comfortable job a gravy job but my dilemma is----is it worth pining through another "era" of "boss-bending-over-backwards-for-his-pet" and nevermind everything else, (dealt with it many times before) or should I see this frustration as a reason to get out of this never-changing workplace and bite the bullet and change jobs?  More dillemma. If I change jobs, it'll be outside of waiting tables and alien to me. Scary for me. So basically my question is--"should I stay or should I go now...."--the clash Wish I woulda joined the service in my youth. At 40 even they would ask the same question---"Yeah, what the hell are YOU gonna do?"