The Life I don't want

I hate my new life.  Less than 15 months ago, I was a woman living in a nice suburb with a 28 year old bird, a 13 year old dog, and a husband I adored.  Now, I'm sitting in the basement of my father's house.  The bird, dog, and husband all gone in the blink of an eye.  The change is too fast and too horrible.  I keep thinking how lucky all three are not to be here in this miserable place.  I look up to God and He keeps picking me up.  People tell me I'm strong.  I say that I have no choice and God keeps rescuing me.
The fact is, I hate this new life.  I don't want to wake up in this strange house.  I'm tired of not seeing my dog.  And I want to see the grey crown of my cockatiel.  I want to see my husband's hazel eyes.   How could so much change in such a short length of time.  The devil is here to steal and destroy.  God restores.  I'm needing that restoration very much. 
I'm just tired, tired, tired.