The Joy of A Military Family

Im the oldest of four. My dad has been in the military my entire life. He did 8 years active duty Army but once my sister and I were born he decided to go reserve. He didn't want us moving around all the time. He wanted us to have a normal childhood. (So much for that...) Since 9/11 my dad has been deployed 3 times. Once to Guantanamo Bay and twice to Iraq. Each deployment being about a year or longer. He was also sent out for Katrina relief.  My dad has missed almost all of the major events in my life over the last 6 years. He wasn't there for my first date. He was never there to see me go to formal or prom. He almost missed my graduation. When i got sick and had to have surgery..dad was gone.  He is currently in Iraq doing his 3rd tour. He should be coming home soon though.  My dad is the only person in my family I am really close to. So needless to say this has left me with some issues. Im here because I want to be healthy again. This is to the point where it is not only affecting me emotionally, but physically as well.  And now it is affecting those around me.  I don't want to be a codependent. I want to stop this. I just feel like every time i try to talk to my family about it they throw stuff in my face. I can't do this alone.