the inevitable happens
Ack.
the last twelve hours or so have been excruciating.
Last night I wented to finish the last wall in the bathroom. It's all messed up.
I had intended to start installing the vanity top today. It ain't gonna happen.
I was obviously frustrated, and apparently I made that obvious. I spent a lot of time and energy on creating, and then again in the what-the-hells.
I could have been more careful. In hindsight I see what I could have done to prevent this, though deep down I wonder if with even that, if it would have been okay.
So it looks like I may have to rip the wall down. That'll be a few days delay.
I had really wanted to get the bathroom working all functionally again. See what happens when I don't get what I want; Act-like-a-baby-time. But no one is complaining, so...
a lot of this is me. I have to really see what is going on here. 1) My evil perfectionist side has gone full bore on my ego, and
2) My evil perfectionist side has gone full bore on my ego. Simple as that. Nobody really is so concerned. I spent the night thinking about it, believing that it will take a major toll on last night's sleep, so I had to try to shake it off.
But this morning...it's still there. I am going to have to deal with it head-on. But I am not ready yet. I need to think about it some more. I also have to keep in mind that I also installed that huge mirror last night, and it is straighter than before. At least I aced that one.
Basically my wife has been supportive, and I can't listen to her. I try. I try hard. I can't keep beating myself up. I know it will work out somehow, I can do this. But she sees how badly I am behaving over all this, which I am fairly sure will crush my hopes to have some sweet sex this weekend. Ugh.
On a lighter note, I will be out in public tonight. the school's volleyball team is annihilating their way to the State Championship again. My daughter is all into it, so I will see what it's all about.
And hopefully, if the dam flows permit, I will be off fishing Monday or Tuesday. We shall see how that goes. somethings to look forward to. But fishing isn't so good when my mind is on other things. So I gotta gotta shake this off. (*shudders*)
Oh, well. I tried to purge it. It didn't cure me. Yet.
Have a great weekend.
the last twelve hours or so have been excruciating.
Last night I wented to finish the last wall in the bathroom. It's all messed up.
I had intended to start installing the vanity top today. It ain't gonna happen.
I was obviously frustrated, and apparently I made that obvious. I spent a lot of time and energy on creating, and then again in the what-the-hells.
I could have been more careful. In hindsight I see what I could have done to prevent this, though deep down I wonder if with even that, if it would have been okay.
So it looks like I may have to rip the wall down. That'll be a few days delay.
I had really wanted to get the bathroom working all functionally again. See what happens when I don't get what I want; Act-like-a-baby-time. But no one is complaining, so...
a lot of this is me. I have to really see what is going on here. 1) My evil perfectionist side has gone full bore on my ego, and
2) My evil perfectionist side has gone full bore on my ego. Simple as that. Nobody really is so concerned. I spent the night thinking about it, believing that it will take a major toll on last night's sleep, so I had to try to shake it off.
But this morning...it's still there. I am going to have to deal with it head-on. But I am not ready yet. I need to think about it some more. I also have to keep in mind that I also installed that huge mirror last night, and it is straighter than before. At least I aced that one.
Basically my wife has been supportive, and I can't listen to her. I try. I try hard. I can't keep beating myself up. I know it will work out somehow, I can do this. But she sees how badly I am behaving over all this, which I am fairly sure will crush my hopes to have some sweet sex this weekend. Ugh.
On a lighter note, I will be out in public tonight. the school's volleyball team is annihilating their way to the State Championship again. My daughter is all into it, so I will see what it's all about.
And hopefully, if the dam flows permit, I will be off fishing Monday or Tuesday. We shall see how that goes. somethings to look forward to. But fishing isn't so good when my mind is on other things. So I gotta gotta shake this off. (*shudders*)
Oh, well. I tried to purge it. It didn't cure me. Yet.
Have a great weekend.
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