The Hell with HER!!!!
Get this-----my so-called girlfriend/fiancee'---whatever the hell she claimed to be---crossed the f---ing line today!!! Many of you know my struggles----my NO self esteem---if not read my journal--or I'll pm you---anyway---this lowlife bitch today ont he phone was talking about a coworker----and she said--"He is three times skinnier than you-if you can believe that"
WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!
And to think I made the mistake of giving her a promise ring---plus many other things I did---her clamining to love me---damned liar!
I had made reservations for us this Labor Day weekend---which Ic ancled---right after I hung up on her immediately!
I busted my cellphone and took uplugged my landline----she can't come to my house---as my awesome German Shepherd has bitten her----smart dog!!!! That should've told me something!!!
What I felt for her---she killed in one sentence! I could forgive cheating over this!
Btw--if you're a female reading my post---imagine a guy saying "She was three times fatter than you-if you can believe that"
I hope she dies a slow, painful death! The death she gave my feelings for her was quick and fast!
Replies
I appreciate your hurt but you have given her permission to hurt you. Decide you are comfortable with your weight and let every one else fxxx off
I'm sorry to hear this. You don't deserve to be treated like that. :( I know this is a difficult topic for you and it sounds like she was being really insensitive, if not downright insulting on purpose.
You're such a good person and friend and I'm sorry she couldn't spend more time focusing on that. You definitely deserve to be treated better. And I say this as someone who has personally experienced extraordinary kindness from you.
I don't know if you even want to work things out with her, but I hope she'll at least have the decency to apologize. I also hope this won't bring you down too much. Always here for you, dear.
MA, exactly how much do you weigh, Son? Are you considered obese? If not, what are you worried about? Are you angry that you think she rejected you? Be strong in your own skin. Let's talk more, N. A. Look, we need you more than you need us. I know I haven't Ben here much, but I have to tell you. I can tell you've changed in your spirit, I know you've always suffered depression but you were always a fighter,. Now, I'm hearing someone who is giving up and allowing Satan to defeat you. This is not the Man I knew 5 years ago.
Email me if necessary, but we can talk. God Bless you Son.
Hate and resentment are like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. This post is bitter enough to smell the poison in the spittle of your rant. I don't know ***The Bitch*** so I will leave her to sort her own, but. . .
How you doing in processing those strictly personal hate toxins? Are you plying any therapy tools?
Gentlest of support and healing hopes.
I am so sorry you were hurt like that. The ones who are closest to us have the power to hurt us the most. I hope and pray that like so many people do she did not intend to be mean, but made a thoughtless comment not thinking how it would affect you. I hope she sees you as stong and confident and did not think when she spoke her comment would bother you. However even if that is true it does not take away the hurt. I would not like to be described as three times bigger than someone. That sounds insulting no matter what size you are. I wish I could say something to help you feel better, but I know hurt lingers for many of us a long time. Instead I will wish for something positive to happen to you today that can make you smile and that you can hold onto and remember when you are angry and discouraged again. Big hugs to you.
Like I said the hell with her---I wish her the best!!! Slow, suffering, painful death in history
My first husband told me he hated fat people after I had gained a lot of weight. He was trying to get out of the marriage..i just didn't know it. Both of his parents were obese. Did he hate them, too? You are so much better off without this game player. Careful that she doesn't pull you back, only to cause more damage. Hugs.
I honestly dont know what to say. Yea,, she sounds like a bit<c.. but you need to remember your self-esteem is totally within your control. You can boost it yourself by focusing on any and all accomplishments. And then keep challenging yourself to make greater accomplishments.. If you do that enough.. your self-esteem will probably go back to a normal level once you realize that you already do so much more than most people..
Ok, harsh love again.
You are allowing her to undervalued you. To start with, you have issues with your own self worth. If you don't value you, you send out signals allowing others not to value you. So...we need to talk again!!
Read John 3:16-17, only this time, put YOUR name in there:
John 3:16-17 New Living Translation (NLT)
16 “For this is how God loved J----- (not sure others know your given name): He gave his one and only Son, so that if J-----believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. 17 God sent his Son into the world not to judge J-----, but to save J----- through him.
If you are worth that, you are worth Way more than you, yourself, believe. So, brother, believe this.
I understand the force behind this rant in a "in the moment" emotion. (Mostly because of some personal things within the last hour...we'll talk about that later) But, right now, I ask you to stop, take a breath, and think...I don't need to try and love someone else until I learn to love myself.
Check my journal and we'll talk.
LU, BROTHER!!!!!
God laid you on my heart right now because I was so far behind in my notifications, I had not seen the notification for this.
Hey, Abba, Father, works in strange and really weird ways.......actually was checking someone else's feed and saw your name there....weird.
You have some major anger issues...perhaps working with your Therapist in learning to regulate your emotions might be of help to you.
I doubt your girlfriend meant anything mean or malicious by her off-hand comment, and especially didn't mean to cause you as much grief, hurt and rage as you are displaying, and causing yourself.
Thanks for ALL posts----I am still mad as H---battling urge to end it all
To those who suggest therapy----PLEASE read my other posts (GOD is unfair)
To those who appear to brush it all like it was nothing----again, if I said to you on this forum :
"Someone three times uglier than you if you can believe that" or
"Someone three times fatter than you if you can believe that"
You'd be cool with it huh?????
I'd NEVER say those things, just putting it into perspective.
BTW awesome update:
I have NOT answered any of her calls and any and all messages I deleted without listening--also---and for once---I AM PROUD OF ME!!!!
I told her to use the reservations I made and told her via text to go with her sister or whomever and have a great time!
LOL! ROFL!
They're drive three hours for nothing---one way!
Hhmm...
So, I've read your "God is not fair" post. The men you reference in that post are not the norm, they are the exception. Most people are regular people who have things about their appearance, weight, body type that they do no like. You put a whole lot of emphasis into your body and appearance and it has nothing to do with God being fair. It has to do with an emotional hangup in your brain. Therapy helps you learn to cope and be accepting of yourself and learn to love yourself as you are, not who you think you should be.
There are many of us out there who deal with so much more than how we look on a day to day basis, things like multiple medical illnesses, constant daily pain from disease, lifetimes riddle with childhood physical and sexual abuse, but we get up each day, we live our life and we do it without anger and rage at others. We've learned how to work through things and accept that no life is not always fair, its just life and everyone has to get through it. God doesn't sit and pick and point to each person on the planet and say who will be favored and who won't, it doesn't work that way, His blueprint was put into design the day the earth was made.
Seeing a Counselor or Therapist helps you learn to manage and deal with all the negative feelings you have going on and you seem to have a lot. With all that anger and rage bouncing around in your head, always trying to find someone to blame....its almost impossible to find a calming, peaceful place to focus on constructive, helpful coping skills to help you manage your feelings and direct them in a more positive direction.