The Game

I thought I had the strength to say no

to move on

but I can't help what I'm feeling right now

it's so strong over me 

like I'm bowing straight towards what I wanted to run from

but its drawing me back away from what I thought to be true

I love it

I hate it

I have no control over myself or my emotions

something I've always been able to handle is now out of my hands 

I have nowhere to go

sometimes I want the path to stop

and by stop I mean end completely

You wouldn't even care what happened to me

All you would miss is the game you're playing

the game of mind and heart

you're winning and I'm letting you

nobody knows about this game except us

and we're playing it well in every area

You're playing to win

I'm playing to participate and be accepted

Same game, but different players

Same wants, but different motives

Neither one of us can give this up

But only one of us is in it for the love of the game

The other is just in it for the stats 

Not for everyone to see, but for personal gain

A gain that makes the other players lose everything

A gain that will turn into a loss at the end of the game

But that player forgets

every game comes to an end.